@op I really need to add dt ur immature & insecure urself. If ur secure within urself, u wouldn't care what others thought of ur wife. They will treat her exactly d way u treat her. Either wt respect or wt disdain. By d time she attends a couple of events wt u she will eventually change her dressing herself. All this inferiority ur feeling is happening in ur own shallow minded head.

I'll give u an example of my parents. My dad is very well educated - schooled in d US, a doctor & a state medical board president. My mum doesn't speak good English. In fact I had to seriously tutor her for her US naturalization tests, but they have a very happy marriage. They go everywhere together, conferences, parties, vacations wt other couples .etc. they ALL respect my mum because my dad adores her. There are many situations my dad tells her to help him wt patients or their families cos she's so warm & has a smile & innocence dt works like magic. Everyone loves her immediately. Too many benefits to count. When I was younger, we would all laugh when she "tabon's", my dad is d one dt tells us to stop laughing. She will also say it's our job to teach her & would laugh about it. They've bn together since they were students & he had nothing. And she has 3 kids - a doctor, a financial analyst & a chartered accountant. So no, she didn't raise dumb children.

Bros please fall bk in love wt ur wife. It's ur love and support dt will make her blossom right before ur eyes. As someone said earlier, no one is useless. Ur so funny though - as if English means anything in China, Germany or France? Who English epp?

Catalin:
You knew she was a third Class graduate and went ahead to marry her, what did you expect? Now you are complaining about her grammar.
Your wife is unintelligent and she doesn't want to stress herself in school, why push her when you know her capabilities.

You say she takes in every time even though you want only 3kids. Are you not the one producing the sperm? I am not understanding.
you guys should go to your doctor and choose a family planning method that will suit you or you might end up with 10kids.

About her clothing issues, why not buy her new set of clothes like bum shorts, sexy gowns and lingeries. Married women most times forget that men are moved by what they see cos they are now married and the think the don't need to impress anyone anymore.There is no crime in buying her clothes you want her to wear.

Why not teach her how to speak good English since she does not want to enroll in school?

Open a small scale business for her and if she refuse to do or mismanage it, then don't give her money for upkeep anymore.

Save your marriage, don't divorce her, divorce will affect your kids I tell you.

U really made sense.

He possibly followed the TRAILS OF BEAUTY.
I guess ur wife is very pretty...
There are so many pretty LADIES that are unintelligent.

janellemonae:
@op I really need to add dt ur immature & insecure urself. If ur secure within urself, u wouldn't care what others thought of ur wife. They will treat her exactly d way u treat her. Either wt respect or wt disdain. By d time she attends a couple of events wt u she will eventually change her dressing herself. All this inferiority ur feeling is happening in ur own shallow minded head.

I'll give u an example of my parents. My dad is very well educated - schooled in d US, a doctor & a state medical board president. My mum doesn't speak good English. In fact I had to seriously tutor her for her US naturalization tests, but they have a very happy marriage. They go everywhere together, conferences, parties, vacations wt other couples .etc. they ALL respect my mum because my dad adores her. There are many situations my dad tells her to help him wt patients or their families cos she's so warm & has a smile & innocence dt works like magic. Everyone loves her immediately. Too many benefits to count. When I was younger, we would all laugh when she "tabon's", my dad is d one dt tells us to stop laughing. She will also say it's our job to teach her & would laugh about it. They've bn together since they were students & he had nothing. And she has 3 kids - a doctor, a financial analyst & a chartered accountant. So no, she didn't raise dumb children.

Bros please fall bk in love wt ur wife. It's ur love and support dt will make her blossom right before ur eyes. As someone said earlier, no one is useless. Ur so funny though - as if English means anything in China, Germany or France? Who English epp?

Well said.
The man is talking as if he never came across all these during courtship.
I guess he was blinded by BEAUTY......
Now BEAUTY has faded away....
Breasts are now sagging gracefully.

I will not forgive his wife, if she can't speak her NATIVE LANGUAGE.
AFTER all ENGLISH is not the most popular Language of the world

lofty900:
If I were in ur shoes, I won't marry such woman in the first place. Probably u married her when there was nothing and now that things are going well u want something better. My brother manage her o. Goodluck Jonathan is managing his own.

nairaland hehehe..

im sure ure the rype that posted pre wedding stupid pix.
baba leave dah side
na 4better 4 worse.
wen i tell fools
dnt let a pussiy lead u2 penury
una go wan cum
ah ahbaby i wan 2cum
ah ah
i love u.
ahhhhhhbbb
I'm cumin aaahhhhhhh
i will marry u
i must marry u.
fools
u don see na mumu illiterate bich na im u marry.

I am very fazed at how some men behave . First of all Sir, You're very wrong to bring up your wife's weakness to the media. Two, You hate your children by considering divorce which God personally hates. Three, You blame her for deliberately getting pregnant, Sir, With all due respects to u, You're very wrong to say that, She's only performing her procreative duties which u perceive as crime in the manner you see as coercive. Four, Your wife's grammatical discrepancies isn't an issue at all, you can live with her if she chooses to stay without upgrading, I have seen countless men who marry very stark illiterate because of a certain trait in them, pls focus on your wife's positive & major on them. As for the dressing, its very simple, Buy her very skimpy wears & tell her to try it on one day and compliment her. As for the pregnancy stuff, since you have your limits , visit the doctor for family planning contraceptive methods ideal for her. My mum is an illiterate but my dad graduated from Manchester, he loves her so dearly because of her good character. Five, Monitor her business, give her the money in bits, encourage her to go for feasibility study, you both read accounting now. You can employ a help to assist her in her shop. Don't alienate your kids from your wife because she can't speak English, The kids have sch teachers & lesson help. Lastly, Don't ever embarrass her again, it kills her confidence & personality. don't report her to anyone , you can work on her, trust me, be her number mentor n be her number one fan. Say no to Divorce I beg you. For further advise, contact me via whatsapp 08138188962. Stay blessed sir

Divorce is not an option. I think as per the business she wants to go into I will advise you invest like 500k to understudy her performance before adding more money. For her dressing you can be her designer by choosing the design and the type of clothes to buy for her. She is obviously not the school type but I am positive she will do well in business if you can give her that chance to prove herself.

Thank you.

Mr Man grow up, not every post is meant for the public.

mctowel01:

lol, as na my first thread as I dey wake up. Truth also, he can't think of divorce for the kids. Butnawa for that woman sha. When even market women take to selling tomatoes to be self sufficient, some are still thinking of being housewives with nothing productive. Anyway, na d man one chance be that.

She feels the man cant do nothing about her....
She's so mentally poor and she's not ready to improve.

The man should just hope non of the kids takes after her.

My parents always told me and they still tell me till date, NEVER FALL IN LOVE WITH AN UNINTELLIGENT WOMAN....JUST FOR THE SAKE OF YOUR KIDS. BN INTELLIGENT IS MOSTLY HEREDITARY.

Op fell in love, the love blinded him from seeing the bad side of his then wife-to-be. Now...e don clear from ein eyes.

lofty900:
If I were in ur shoes, I won't marry such woman in the first place. Probably u married her when there was nothing and now that things are going well u want something better. My brother manage her o. Goodluck Jonathan is managing his own.

This is very true and very funny at the same time.

10000000000 likes joor.

My brother divorce is not the best option here. Remember the kids (the unborn one inclusive). Do not dwell on the negatives alone, sit down and cogitate about her positive aspect. She may not been an academic guru or fashionista but is she the submissive type; does she accord your parent and siblings their due respect? Is she faithful to you or jumps from one bed to the other? I know men who are married to highly successful career ladies who dress gorgeously but are passing through hell in their marriage. Remember the greatest harm you can do to your children is raising them in broken home.

e no easy

BaEnki:

Wetin qualify am as Olosho?

Ex olosho

Hmmmmm ...All these people castigating the OP, I pray you never get saddled with people who give you gloom! She can't work, can't represent family well, can't dress well, can't plan well, can't teach the kids....Fooooork! This is gloooomy dude!

What's so highended about asking your partner to be a better person, supportive and in agreement with you? Husband and wife should be able to plan a family nau! Do family planning Biko! Do your part to contribute or care for yourself! Whew! I wish the OP good luck. Peeps with stories like his are the reason I take my time to ensure I jive with the other person...Can't deal sheet mehn! Unintelligent people are guilty of a crime against humanity

oshorstan:
I am very fazed at how some men behave . First of all Sir, You're very wrong to bring up your wife's weakness to the media. Two, You hate your children by considering divorce which God personally hates. Three, You blame her for deliberately getting pregnant, Sir, With all due respects to u, You're very wrong to say that, She's only performing her procreative duties which u perceive as crime in the manner you see as coercive. Four, Your wife's grammatical discrepancies isn't an issue at all, you can live with her if she chooses to stay without upgrading, I have seen countless men who marry very stark illiterate because of a certain trait in them, pls focus on your wife's positive & major on them. As for the dressing, its very simple, Buy her very skimpy wears & tell her to try it on one day and compliment her. As for the pregnancy stuff, since you have your limits , visit the doctor for family planning contraceptive methods ideal for her. My mum is an illiterate but my dad graduated from Manchester, he loves her so dearly because of her good character. Five, Monitor her business, give her the money in bits, encourage her to go for feasibility study, you both read accounting now. You can employ a help to assist her in her shop. Don't alienate your kids from your wife because she can't speak English, The kids have sch teachers & lesson help. Lastly, Don't ever embarrass her again, it kills her confidence & personality. don't report her to anyone , you can work on her, trust me, be her number mentor n be her number one fan. Say no to Divorce I beg you. For further advise, contact me via whatsapp 08138188962. Stay blessed sir

very good advice was pleased with it but sometimes he who wears the shoe knows the pain

Oh God, which kain woman be that.Na wa oh.
Your marriage need devine intervention and your wife need help and a very strong orientation badly.Who are her friends?

I hear if a person marry a dumb woman, the dumbness will likely be transferred to the kids.That shall not be your portion.Anen

@ OP can I ask what attracted you to her in the first place and how did you guys meet. I am sorry to say this, the signs (illiteracy and non-nonchalant attitude about life goals) were there before you get married. these are always not hidden. It goes back to my beloved saying that guys keep marrying the ladies/women they don't want their daughters to become.

Don't divorce her, you are her meal ticket and she's committed to you. Just 'deal' cope with it.

Kellibae:
Naturally Shez not d school type.
I dnt know where to start ooo.

I can feel ur pain... sorry op
But ill be back.

*Modifed*.. but op education aint everythin.
Pls accept her d way she is i wont advice divorce...
As for her poor dressing u can always do somethin abt.
U can employ a fashionista or if u dnt hav d money u can consult any of ur relative who
Has better dress sense to stay with u guys for few months to help her..
bliv she would be better.

As for her business i think she has to learn it as u rightly said..before venturing into it.
Your wife aint cheatin on u no quarelling u.
So dnt divorce her...U can polish her.
Accept her the d way she is cox the way u goin about could affect her esteem and make her feel shez a worthless numbskull.

BETTER THE ANGEL U KNOW THAN THE DEVIL U DONT.

best advice so far ,u r a gud person, I want to add DT he cud give her 200000 out of 1.5 so she can start small if she manages DT one well u can now add more money, dnt divorce ur wife buy her d kind of clothe u wud want Ber wear

melejo:
Don't bother yourself explaining too much. You must know that nairaland is full of children. Just read the matured response and move on. Sincerely i feel your pain. I had very similar experience with the girl I was planning to marry. After trying to encourage her to improve and she kept resisting, I let her go. Yours is different because you're married already with kids so try and forget about divorce, it's not a solution to your problem. There must be something you're wife is good at. Carefully identify her area of strength and build her up. On dressing I noticed that women that have poor dressing sence hardly improve while married but its not impossible. So you need to take her out from time to time and let her get some good clothes that suitable for her especially romantic night wears. You can also buy her some simple books regularly on different subjects to improve her spoken and written English, above all don't forget to pray that's if you are not like Seun of nairaland

My dear, thanks for your comment, but I must let you know that, in my house house, I have reasonable books that can help her improve her speaking skills, but she just dont want to read them. I even bought "Brighter Grammer" volume 1 to 4 and handed over to her but she would not read them. My library is full of different books that anybody can read.

Guys, you may not understand. Its not as if i want her to be extraordinary or super human over night, the truth is that she is not making any effort to improve. Remember the saying that says "you can only take a horse to river, but you cannot force a horse to drink water". God knows, I have tried to see that i "brush" her up to a certain level.

wonukwuru:
I am adult married to a lady of 35years. We have been married since 2007. God has blessed us with 3 wonderful children( 2 boys and 1 girl). Before we got married, i agreed with my wife that i only want to have 2 kids ( I wouldnt mind if they just boys or girls. That means, Im not particular of the sex of the kids). My wife is a B.sc Accounting graduate, while myself, I am a Chartered Accountant, with a well paid job. My wife had a 3rd class degree. On several occassions, i have told her to go back to school for Post Graduate Diploma (PGD) in order to upgrade, but she plainly told me that she cannot go back to school again. When i asked her why, she told me that her brain cannot withstand any academic stree again. I also suggested to her, since you studied accounting in the university, why not enroll for ICAN program? When i said that to her, she told me that she could not go for PGD, is it ICAN that she can do? I have been thinking, what will i do for her to be like others.

Luckly, was transferred to Benin. I went with my family to Benin. We stayed over 4years in Benin. While we were in Benin, I told my wife to go and enroll for a 6months diploma programm in computer (because she is not computer literate). I paid over N110,000 for the 6months programme. My wife only went for the programme for 1month and stopped. She refused to complete the program. When I asked her, she told me that she will go back after she had "put to bed"( Then she was pregnant). Guys, its over two years now and the baby is even in pre-nursery school, yet my wife has not reminded me of going back to complete the programme.

Last year, she asked me to open a store for her, that she want to go into trading. When I asked her the nature of the business, she said, she wants to deal on selling rice, beans, yams, groundnut oil, etc. I now suggested that it will not be a problem, but she has to look for somebody who is already in the business so as to understudy the person for atleast 1month. She refused, saying that without her understudying anybody, that she can still make it. I told her that my reason of suggesting to her to understudy somebody was that, i wanted her to be selling in wholesale. My plan was to give like N1.5million. I told her, i cannot just release N1.5million to her for a business that she did not learn. I told her that N1.5million is not a small money. Brethren, that was why up til now, i have not opened the business for her.

My children's school fees is over N650,00 per term for the 3 kids. I provide for feeding. My wife does not want to do anything as to assist me in the family. I give her money for her hair, cream, bathing soap, panties and clothing. Im really getting tired. My salary does not carry the family again because of too much expenses.

Another problem now is, my wife's dressing is nothing to write home about. She dresses as if she is in her late 60s. I have complained to her on several occasion that i dont like the way she dresses, but each time i bring up the issue, she will get angry. People around, have meeting my sisters to tell them that my wife does not dress well as somebody that has gone to the university. Even in my house, my wife only tires wrapper. Nothing in her again attracts me to her. Infact, for the past 3 months, i have not slept with her. I sleep in the parlour while she sleeps in the bed room.

Else, i forget, my wife delibrately "took in" again since July last year. This is after we agreed that the 3 kids that we already have is enough. Her method is, each time i remind her of what to do as to be assisting me in the family, she will delibrately "take in".

My wife, went to the university but she cannot speak simple and correct english. She cannot write application letter. She cannot teach my kids who are in primary 2 and 5 respectively. I pay a lesson teacher N30,000 monthly for my kids but my wife is at home doing nothing. Since we got married, my wife has not sent me text message on her phone more than 3times. The ones that she sent, my brothers, there are lots of gramatical blunders. When i confronted her with the text message, she could not say anything. I was checking for some documents in my room last week, and i came across an application that my wife wrote to submit to a private school where she wants to teach. When i saw the letter, believe me, my brothers, one of my kids that is in primary 5 cannot write such rubbish.

What i thought she was before i married her, is not what she is. I cannot take her out for an occassion because she may embarrase me by her conduct in the public. I need a divorce but the problem now is, i did i court wedding with her. What should i do? Im confused.

You are not sharp to be observing dt she is an olodo nw. It takes me only two contacts to kw an intelligent lady. It is common nowadays our graduates are terrible in written and spoken English esp HND holders. I jst dropped one I am dating BC her written English is terrible disaster. My bro it's for better or for worse manage her

We all always make mistake by thinking higher institution equate to intelligence. You are in this and I want you to work it out. If it's not beyond all you've said, I believe it can work out. Stay put but try different strategies. Find out what motivates your wife. First, go down to her level and then bring her to your level..Please, be humble enough to do that.Don't try to change anything about her again. Women don't change when we keep complaining. If she dresses anyhow, go out with her and be very proud of her. If she decided to eat at 'Iya Shaki' restaurant instead of KFC, go with her. Everything you've been complaining about, stop them. Remember, when you are in her status, that is not you. You went low to bring her up. If you don't go to her level, you won't understand her view of life..When you understand her views very well, you will change her.

This method is not "2 mins instant noodles". It could take a year but u will see result..

wonukwuru:
I am adult married to a lady of 35years. We have been married since 2007. God has blessed us with 3 wonderful children( 2 boys and 1 girl). Before we got married, i agreed with my wife that i only want to have 2 kids ( I wouldnt mind if they just boys or girls. That means, Im not particular of the sex of the kids). My wife is a B.sc Accounting graduate, while myself, I am a Chartered Accountant, with a well paid job. My wife had a 3rd class degree. On several occassions, i have told her to go back to school for Post Graduate Diploma (PGD) in order to upgrade, but she plainly told me that she cannot go back to school again. When i asked her why, she told me that her brain cannot withstand any academic stree again. I also suggested to her, since you studied accounting in the university, why not enroll for ICAN program? When i said that to her, she told me that she could not go for PGD, is it ICAN that she can do? I have been thinking, what will i do for her to be like others.

Luckly, was transferred to Benin. I went with my family to Benin. We stayed over 4years in Benin. While we were in Benin, I told my wife to go and enroll for a 6months diploma programm in computer (because she is not computer literate). I paid over N110,000 for the 6months programme. My wife only went for the programme for 1month and stopped. She refused to complete the program. When I asked her, she told me that she will go back after she had "put to bed"( Then she was pregnant). Guys, its over two years now and the baby is even in pre-nursery school, yet my wife has not reminded me of going back to complete the programme.

Last year, she asked me to open a store for her, that she want to go into trading. When I asked her the nature of the business, she said, she wants to deal on selling rice, beans, yams, groundnut oil, etc. I now suggested that it will not be a problem, but she has to look for somebody who is already in the business so as to understudy the person for atleast 1month. She refused, saying that without her understudying anybody, that she can still make it. I told her that my reason of suggesting to her to understudy somebody was that, i wanted her to be selling in wholesale. My plan was to give like N1.5million. I told her, i cannot just release N1.5million to her for a business that she did not learn. I told her that N1.5million is not a small money. Brethren, that was why up til now, i have not opened the business for her.

My children's school fees is over N650,00 per term for the 3 kids. I provide for feeding. My wife does not want to do anything as to assist me in the family. I give her money for her hair, cream, bathing soap, panties and clothing. Im really getting tired. My salary does not carry the family again because of too much expenses.

Another problem now is, my wife's dressing is nothing to write home about. She dresses as if she is in her late 60s. I have complained to her on several occasion that i dont like the way she dresses, but each time i bring up the issue, she will get angry. People around, have meeting my sisters to tell them that my wife does not dress well as somebody that has gone to the university. Even in my house, my wife only tires wrapper. Nothing in her again attracts me to her. Infact, for the past 3 months, i have not slept with her. I sleep in the parlour while she sleeps in the bed room.

Else, i forget, my wife delibrately "took in" again since July last year. This is after we agreed that the 3 kids that we already have is enough. Her method is, each time i remind her of what to do as to be assisting me in the family, she will delibrately "take in".

My wife, went to the university but she cannot speak simple and correct english. She cannot write application letter. She cannot teach my kids who are in primary 2 and 5 respectively. I pay a lesson teacher N30,000 monthly for my kids but my wife is at home doing nothing. Since we got married, my wife has not sent me text message on her phone more than 3times. The ones that she sent, my brothers, there are lots of gramatical blunders. When i confronted her with the text message, she could not say anything. I was checking for some documents in my room last week, and i came across an application that my wife wrote to submit to a private school where she wants to teach. When i saw the letter, believe me, my brothers, one of my kids that is in primary 5 cannot write such rubbish.

What i thought she was before i married her, is not what she is. I cannot take her out for an occassion because she may embarrase me by her conduct in the public. I need a divorce but the problem now is, i did i court wedding with her. What should i do? Im confused.

MHEN.....................NKAN BE!!..STANGE BUT TRUE

@op...this is a NATIONAL ISSUE ooo, and should not be discussed only on nairaland but should be taken to senate.

But on a serious note...i feel your pain, try and explore all avenues to upgrade her...if unupgradable, do the needful abeg!!!

ops my advice with you is this, do not divorce your wife see what you need to do is this buy OUR DAIRY MANNER (ODM) this January - March edition use it in your morning and evening devotion say the prayers that follow the study I believe your wife will change guide her allow her to be the one conducting the prayer through there you guide her help with better understanding after going through a sentence in the write up I believe by the time this year runs half your wife will speak good English better than you try me on this one.

for better for worse brother. thank you.

Why do you need a divorce? It's not like u caught her cheating or doing something abominable or unbearable. U have been with this woman for almost 10 years. If divorce was to be an option, it should have been prior to kids or in the very early years. My advice to you is to involve a member of the family that she listens to, to talk to her, possibly her parents as well. Let them know how exactly you feel.

tolulinks:

All that crap about your wife's literary ability is not important. You saw her limitations before marrying her and you married her for life so, no excuse. There is a reason she came out with 3rd class. Now her interests: she wants to sell yam oil etc. THAT IS HER INTEREST. not yours and you have to support her in that regards. She obviously doesnt care about anything white collar. In fact she's the quitissential housewife and that's what she wants to be. She can't see herself in offices etc and it's for a reason because unlike you she knows her limitations. You can't change her. You mentioned telling her you don't want more kids but you are ejaculating in her pot? What did you expect? Either clip your seminal duct or use condoms! A woman won't perform that surgical procedure to block her uterus. It's frightening. In terms of dressing, you can upgrade her a bit. Buy her stuffs. Get her to dress like French maids while serving you dinner and all if that picks your nose. Take her out. Make subtle points about dresses you like. BUY THEM for her. Thank me later

Best advise yet. Apply the above to the letter and you can never go wrong. Make a conscious effort to increase her self-esteem and you won't worry of her disgracing you in public. Gain her confidence and she will share her SMS, letter with you before sending, correct them with love and without prejudices. Gradually her improvement will amaze you. I will not advice home trainer immediately because this will cause her to think you want to ridicule her and all other efforts will be wasted.
On business, I tell you she refused to understudy the experienced ones because of the way you presented it. Take action that shows you support her all the way by getting her a shop at an area of her chosen. Then you may advise her to try a month tutelage before starting. To burst your bubbles a little, 1.5 is not a big money in that business, don't commonise food business please. Its a viable alternate source of income in my home.
Last word of advise- whether she went through tutelage or not, you will lose your first investment. Its not a curse, its principle of business and not her fault, so consider that a training period. Don't let that deter you. But don't put in all the money. Trust her for the second investment and give her the freedom but dont stop the loving advise in her business and personal life. Also, not all shining stones are gold. Many so-called learned women out there have worse traits. Learn to celebrate your wife.

There's is not worse than a bad marriage. Op I feel your pain and mainly because I'm pretty much experiencing the same thing, like people have suggested please pray about it and pray for her because you guys already have 3 kids(does that include the pregnancy) which will make divorce the next best option hard except you're pushed to the wall.
I know how hard it is, I pray you find that solution your heart desires.

OP, this Your cross e heavy, I cannot carry. Sorry

janellemonae:


You took the words right out of my mouth. You are so right. This op has killed dt woman's self esteem. I just feel sorry for her cos I'm sure she has cried herself to bed many nights. The way he wrote this with so much disdain & irritation, I can imagine d attitude he actually puts up to her. The woman herself must be full of anger & resentment.

@op, dt woman has bn pregnant most of d time Uve bn married. 4 kids in 10 years & u want her to look like a model automatically. Do u think it's easy?? She needs loving motivation, not condemnation. God is watching u. You want to divorce a woman dt has 4 kids for you & who never hurt u in anyway. Just remember dt he'll hath no fury dn a woman scorned. This is a destiny altering decision u want to make right now. Trust me, it won't end well for u.

So having kids is now a job that will put food on the table. Interesting.

My brother, marriage is for better for worst. You have to adjust your thought, accept what you have seen first, then gradually try to modify it with words of encouragements then you will see changes

wonukwuru:
I have taken time to read all your wonderful comments, even though some are very insulting. For crying out loud, why will come online to discuss my family if I don't need a solution? I said in my post that my wife deliberately takes in anytime I remind her of what to do to assist in the family. Some of you are asking if I'm not the person doing it and why don't I use condom. For your information, my wife is the type that does not like her husband using condom on her. In fact, the day she saw condom in the house, she went to our pastor to report me that I'm using it outside. Her reasoning is that anybody with a condom is an "ashawo". On the other issue, it's not as if I never noticed her academic backwardness during our courtshithough my thought was that she will improve beside, she had over 2years extra for a course of 4years and by then we are already married. So, how could I have known that she will graduate with 3rd class? Believe me guys, I cannot lie against her on this platform. All I have said is nothing but the truth. Ok, tell me, will I stop sleeping with my wife? I have even complained to the sisters. I did not initiate this post to be rediculed, all I need is matured advice on how to handle the situation. Agreed, I made a mistake by marrying her in the first place, but it has already happened, what do I do? I'm not foolish or careless as somebody commented above.

My brother, a lot of NLers have rightly advised you and I wish to add my voice. In as much as there is no infidelity issue, please continue to do the best you can to "upgrade" her. For the sake of your children, do not divorce.