The reason why we have lots of broken relationships and marriages is because we don’t really understand the right way to love. This may be a long read.

Being in a healthy relationship requires that you are first in love with yourself, meaning that you do all that is required to live a happy life by yourself before deciding to share some of that happiness with someone else. Don’t go looking for who to complete you, no one was designed to be your perfect half.

As a person, you should thrive to grow emotionally, financially, spiritually, physically and mentally because these are important for you to live a fulfilling life, stop trying to outsource these things. Be in a relationship because you want to share a part of you with someone not because you are lacking something.

Now, we can’t really tell our heart who to love but we can control what to do with that emotion. Be disciplined enough to know that it’s not every feeling that you act on.

Be with someone who’s on the same level of emotional maturity as you, or be conscious enough to know when to be quiet and learn. Beliefs and general view of the life play an important role, so you also want to be with someone who shares similar ones with you.

Summary

A healthy relationship is when two people who love themselves individually make a decision to come together and share love and happiness. It’s two people bringing in their 100%, not 50% each.

Yeah. Best way to love is to be vulnerable and not acting macho man or feminazi woman.

you have spoken well.
the society is filled with people not wanting to work on themselves but waiting for someone who will be comfy with them and their trash.
lots of persons don't want to improve themselves beyond the average.
some pungent characters have been adopted as the norm for both genders.

they go ahead to enter relationships because of selfish interests and gains.
the moment they feel they are not getting what they were aiming for or they've had their fill, they look for a way out.
it's pitiable

Love is going into extinction. Almost everything is for selfish reason

So how far with your own relationship?
It is easier to preach and lecture.

KanwuliaExtra:
So how far with your own relationship?
It is easier to preach and lecture.

I’m not preaching, neither am I forcing you to take anything I said.

People who give the best advice are the ones who keep the worst relationships

I hope the OP channels her advise into her own life

missimelda01:

I’m not preaching, neither am I forcing you to take anything I said.

Please, take note.

StPete:
People who give the best advice are the ones who keep the worst relationships

I hope the OP channels her advise into her own life

GBAM!

Pure psychology. When people have failed in their own relationships, they start online counseling sessions.
Or they start posting 'Livingston' threads all over the Family section.
As kpe consolation tactics.
Sounds like an old NL ID I remember that was very melancholic about relationship topics. Always in sifia pains with all her posts and topics.

Cutehector:
Yeah. Best way to love is to be vulnerable and not acting macho man or feminazi woman.

Is to be vulnerable? You are kidding, right?,

Kobojunkie:
Is to be vulnerable? You are kidding, right?,

NL nor go kee porsin with laffta sha.

Some people just use words they don't understand. Sounds like what 'Ashi-Waju' would say.

Mungo Park theory!

Vulnerability
Vulnerability refers to "the quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either physically or emotionally." A window of vulnerability is a time frame within which defensive measures are diminished, compromised, or lacking. Wikipedia

KanwuliaExtra:



Please, take note.



GBAM!

Pure psychology. When people have failed in their own relationships, they start online counseling sessions.
Or they start posting 'Livingston' threads all over the Family section.
As kpe consolation tactics.
Sounds like an old NL ID I remember that was very melancholic about relationship topics. Always in sifia pains with all her posts and topics.

Lol I’m not advising you or anyone else. I wrote based on experience, observations and what I’ve learned so far. Why do you sound bitter?

P.S you should know by now that failure isn’t the same as making mistakes and learning from it. You are not perfect, no one is. Have a great day

missimelda01:


Lol I’m not advising you or anyone else. I wrote based on experience, observations and what I’ve learned so far. Why do you sound bitter?

P.S you should know by now that failure isn’t the same as making mistakes and learning from it. You are not perfect, no one is. Have a great day

Thanks

Kobojunkie:
Is to be vulnerable? You are kidding, right?,

this confused feminazi, leave me alone.

Cutehector:
this confused feminazi, leave me alone.

So, because I pointed out what appeared to be flawed reasoning on your part, I become a feminazi?

Kobojunkie:
So, because I pointed out what appeared to be flawed reasoning on your part, I become a feminazi?

it's flawed reasoning in your brain because your thoughts are flawed.


Are you a feminist or not? Want to deny?

Cutehector:
it's flawed reasoning in your brain because your thoughts are flawed.
Are you a feminist or not? Want to deny?

So, you actually believe that the best approach in relationship is for a man to make himself vulnerable?

Lol if them ask this OP if he can DATE not even marry ooo, A determined man on 30k monthly income without degree and material things.

What you will hear is over my dead body. The thing is as a Man, I don't even like engaging the Female Gender because i know better.

What you must understand is Men have destroyed the World with their endless GREED. It is very much worse in Africa, Nigeria Exclusive. The kind of Humans in Nigeria, Most especially in recent times usually make me want to question the Source Of Creation. You must not expect to find LOVE in such place of all places.

A country where just a Single Man will destroy other Mens Lives in order for him to enjoy the good things of life and keep safe his own family.

A country where dark forces Group of Men would sit down to discuss on how to manipulate and deceive people, elevate their sufferings, etc.

I have and know Secrets of supposed people who call themselves Clerics, Pastors, Imams, Moralist, I mean those "Top People" you Gullible people usually look up to, who are heavily involved in diabolical activities and they keep destroying other peoples lives at will in order for them to keep staying afloat. Who knows, Perhaps Your Dad might even be among these Evil Men. They are the reason why everything is so difficult. Many among you are Ignorant of the happenings in the Spiritual Realm.

I'm already tired to keep on typing...Later.

AGAPE LOVE is not a thing of Joke or Mockery.

Evolutionlove:
Lol if them ask this OP if he can DATE not even marry ooo, A determined man on 30k monthly income without degree and material things.

What you will hear is over my dead body. The thing is as a Man, I don't even like engaging the Female Gender because i know better.

What you must understand is Men have destroyed the World with their endless GREED. It is very much worse in Africa, Nigeria Exclusive. The kind of Humans in Nigeria, Most especially in recent times usually make me want to question the Source Of Creation. You must not expect to find LOVE in such place of all places.

A country where just a Single Man will destroy other Mens Lives in order for him to enjoy the good things of life and keep safe his own family.

A country where dark forces Group of Men would sit down to discuss on how to manipulate and deceive people, elevate their sufferings, etc.

I have and know Secrets of supposed people who call themselves Clerics, Pastors, Imams, Moralist, I mean those "Top People" you Gullible people usually look up to, who are heavily involved in diabolical activities and they keep destroying other peoples lives at will in order for them to keep staying afloat. Who knows, Perhaps Your Dad might even be among these Evil Men. They are the reason why everything is so difficult. Many among you are Ignorant of the happenings in the Spiritual Realm.

I'm already tired to keep on typing...Later.

AGAPE LOVE is not a thing of Joke or Mockery.

Any woman who agrees to date a “determined man” with 30k salary, no degree and no material thing without any reasonable plan in action is taking a very bad deal and will likely live in poverty - except she’s below this level or at par. Not sure a reasonable man will even take this deal.

I agree with OP. Love yourself & elevate to the best version of yourself emotionally, financially, spiritually and physically. Then attract the best mate at that level. At that level, this poverty angle you’re coming from wont even be up for discussion.

DestinyGlory:
■Any woman who agrees to date a “determined man” with 30k salary, no degree and no material thing without any reasonable plan in action is taking a very bad deal and will likely live in poverty - except she’s below this level or at par. Not sure a reasonable man will even take this deal.
■ I agree with OP. Love yourself & elevate to the best version of yourself emotionally, financially, spiritually and physically. Then attract the best mate at that level. At that level, this poverty angle you’re coming from wont even be up for discussion.

1. Nigerian men make that deal enmasse that is why they are major contributors to the problem that is poverty in Nigeria.

2. A disproportionate number of Nigerian men marry down, however.

DestinyGlory:


Any woman who agrees to date a “determined man” with 30k salary, no degree and no material thing without any reasonable plan in action is taking a very bad deal and will likely live in poverty - except she’s below this level or at par. Not sure a reasonable man will even take this deal.

I agree with OP. Love yourself & elevate to the best version of yourself emotionally, financially, spiritually and physically. Then attract the best mate at that level. At that level, this poverty angle you’re coming from wont even be up for discussion.

You failed to assimilate the true purpose of my message. I'm not advising or forcing OP to marry a Poor Man.

I am only pointing out the Obvious. You people should stop deceiving yourselves and also stop getting worried. There is nothing like AGAPE LOVE anymore.

Thank Goodness at your last paragraph as you have emphasized. Nothing to discuss here again.

Arguing with the Female Gender is always a futile effort.

.

missimelda01:

A healthy relationship is when two people who love themselves individually make a decision to come together and share love and happiness. It’s two people bringing in their 100%, not 50% each.

Are you willing to give your 100% to a man or waiting to compliment a man's 100% with your 10%?

Acidosis:


Are you willing to give your 100% to a man or waiting to compliment a man's 100% with your 10%?

Refer your question to someone with 10%, definitely not me. Bye

missimelda01:

Refer your question to someone with 10%, definitely not me. Bye

Evolutionlove:


You failed to assimilate the true purpose of my message. I'm not advising or forcing OP to marry a Poor Man.

I am only pointing out the Obvious. You people should stop deceiving yourselves and also stop getting worried. There is nothing like AGAPE LOVE anymore.

Thank Goodness at your last paragraph as you have emphasized. Nothing to discuss here again.

Arguing with the Female Gender is always a futile effort.

If you think arguing with female gender is futile, then you shouldn’t have replied my post. Emotionally intelligent people understand that there is wisdom in appreciating the perspective and opinion of others regardless of their gender. I simply highlighted the part of your argument I disagreed with and shared my opinion. If “Agape Love” doesn’t exist in your reality, then that’s your version of truth - doesn’t mean it’s true. There are still good and genuine people out there who are ready to do the work and love wholeheartedly.

KanwuliaExtra:

Pure psychology. When people have failed in their own relationships, they start online counseling sessions.
Or they start posting 'Livingston' threads all over the Family section.
As kpe consolation tactics.
Sounds like an old NL ID I remember that was very melancholic about relationship topics. Always in sifia pains with all her posts and topics.