I am surprised that a woman can say that a fellow woman deserves a beating I mean I can understand that a man may loose his temper once in a very rare while but what of men who habitually beat their wife?
I do not think I did anything to deserve being beaten mby my ex and I actually suspected then, that he used to derive some sort of sadistic pleasureand arousal from it.

ono:

@kasali, your entry on Biola and Nimiye is really thought provoking. And how have you been coping with these friends of yours? I see they've developed thick skin for beating.

I don't think their skin is thick. I think their minds/perspective is warped. They are still made of blood and bones. So if/when a man beats them, it will still hurt. Their stories are very, very sad because they are searching for an abusive person to call "Husband".

I definitely will not stand a woman slapping me. I might not return an amplified slap but I mean. . . I advocate non-violence. I can only accept it if she's high-strung or has a nervous breakdown. Every other reason is moot.

No, I don't think a woman should be beaten -- she aint your slave and that's that. For those of you that think you deserve to be beaten well . . .

Well,it starts during courtship.If ur man ever makes attempt to lay his hand on u,then be ready to be beaten when u get married. Make him to promise never to beat u when u both get married.Let him vow so that he wont ever beat u when he remembers.4me? I can never think of beating myself.So my wife is safe no matter what she does.Please ladies always look into the future when u are in love so that u wont regret a life time.

. . . and for those of you who think its one of those things, it starts with a simple slap; when and where it ends, no one knows. Here is the story of a victim of domestic voilence:

Victoria and Stankov got married in Austria a few months after leaving Nigeria. But five years after their marriage, tragedy struck. Victoria's dream and aspirations were killed, and in their stead emerged a gory story that qualifies for a place among the best of the popular Alfred Hitchcock series "Hammer House of Horror", if filmed.

In 1991, in the height of a family quarrel, Stankov strangled Victoria, and presuming her to be dead, fled the family apartment located at Untere Wunkau 70, Parndorf, Austria. Stankov was subsequently arrested, convicted by an Austrian court and sentenced to seven years imprisonment, and has since been released to continue his normal life.

But for Victoria, today, 20 years since she departed Nigeria for Austria, instead of a successful family life, she is lying as a "vegetable" in a nursing home in Muhlgasse, Frauenkirchen, Burgenland Province, a suburb more than 40 kilometres from the Austrian capital, Vienna. She has not only lost her memory and speech, but she is also lying in a condition of total paralysis since the past 15 years.

Full Story: http://naijanet.com/news/source/2006/mar/31/1005.html

Very sad . So beasts like this still exist. If I had any say in his imprisonment eight years isn't what you server for reducing a fellow human to a vegetable .

what a terrible man the man who swore to love her forever, in sickness and in health now, look what he's done to her

Kinda Sad but I tell U that's stupid and unnecessary . We guys need to think of the pic below

That's a pretty baby. Can you explain what the pic's for?

Every dude b4 heatin' a woman , U need to remember or think how U would feel as a baby watchin' ur momma heat by a stranger or dad.

it's sick

if u say u love ya woman than why the hell must u beat her up

cant u talk to her nicely?
it's sick just foolishness

I said this once and i'll say it again any man who beats women is a b1tch and if anyone lays a hand on the women of nairaland,naija,ghana,any woman of Africa.
I'm going to kick their a$$.

u have no reason to lay ur hand on ur wife,
is really bad,

People are evil, no amount of anger and provocation should make a man do this to his woman or any other human being. that's really pathetic, domestic violence is really a terrible phenomenum and should not be tolerated at any level beating up ur spouse is nothing but weakness but unfortunately this act is accepted in some societies and religions.

But there have been instances where some women had proved that they enjoy the beating sometimes. You know, beat , pet , make love and reconcile with her. Sounds interesting; isn't it?

now thats one thing i can't stand, call me stupid but the day my boyfriend beats me thats it we're not married hes raising his filthy hands wots going to happen when we get married, and if my husband beats me , If we ve children, First time i'll forgive him try to make thing work for the kids and us, second time thats it, God knows there'll be no third time

All the post in here are interesting with one point or the other.

Well! I will believe everyone should know the calibre of men or lady they'll deal with in order to rule of the beating issue.

If you will believe with me, it is while courting you would have known whether the partner you are with will one day slap you or not. During your conversation or while playing an occurence like that will one day occur. When it occurs, it is your right to state at that time for the guy, factically, with a question "do you want to slap/beat me" take proper note of his response and reactions then.

Beating up a lady did not just start, it all starts a day, it may be play.

Consider this too, do not marry a person whose beliefs differs from yours.

For instance, a school cert holder who longs after a commercial bus driver might end up being a punching bar.

The environment, the nature, the calibre, beliefs or fate of your partner will considerable conclude or depicts in such fellow will become a punching bar or not.

For those that beats their wives i don't blame them, the woman wants it. i guess

look out for more post,

A man who hits or abuses any woman should not be called a man. I broke up with a boyfriend of mine partly becuase he bits his female cousins and sisters. Seeing this, I knew that one day he will raise his filty hands on me and I was not willing to experience that. In general, men hits women becuase they can get away with it. I suggest this to any women, once a man brutally hits you, hire a thug and have them beat the crab out of him. While they are doing that, they should warn him that the next time he will try beating her again, he will be a dead man. When he comes home with bruces, help him clean himself up. If tells you what happen, tell him that you are sorry that you overreacted.
NEXT TIME BEFORE HE RAISE HIS HANDS ON YOU HE, WILL REMEBER THE TRAIT MADE BY THE THUGS.

I was reading an article in the newspaper today by a woman whose husband starting hitting her after they'd been married for 15 years! Never did it before then suddenly he turned mean. It took her several years to leave him as she just couldn't quite believe what was happening and was too embarrassed to tell anyone and get help.

Why do men do these things?

Dem never born the man wey go beat me. Na otapiapi go be im second name and R.I.P his surname.

Yeye fowl wey no gree lay egg, na throway dem dey throwam.

I hail all Waffarians jare

@ono

i dont think i read anywhere, where u said that every woman deserves to be beaten by their husbands. guys give him a break now.

@mcdoe

see what you said there was very very very interesting.
in basic sciences we are taught that, that phrase you said is a cycling of domestic abuse especially in individuals with TYPE C PERSONALITY DISORDER (dependent)

1. the woman irritates the man
2. tension and verbal insults escalate
3. so she knows that in other to get the attention she has to provoke him
4. the man beats the woman
5. he feels bad, showers her with gifts and tender affection
6. woman is happy for a short while
7. REPEAT.

of course this is not always the case for all victims.

I don`t support violence on Women.But some have razor mouth,can insult,abuse previlleges,etc
Some can`t stay without being beaten in a week/month.Why can`t Women make their husbands happy instead of provoking them.

MY ANSWER IS (GET MARRIED,THEN YOU WILL PERFECTLY UNDERSTAND)

For an African man he believes his wife is his property. .
Wife battery is barbaric, uncivilized and totally unacceptable

le sigh   Why y'all love to dig up threads from the dark ages - Gawd! this thread is from 2006

epi:

le sigh   Why y'all love to dig up threads from the dark ages - Gawd! this thread is from 2006

it doesnt matter jor. the topic is a very good one and the issue at hand is still very relevant today. so the continued discussion of it is needed.

well i slapped my husband once he slapped me back , i called his dad and sisters and told everyone about it. (i did not even feel the slap) but i claimed i did.

I will never ever hit a woman first. However, if a woman slaps me, i'd give her two in return.

i'll never start d violence but dont think a woman can get away after slappin me, it just cant happen

Note to the women: if you tolerate a husband that beats you, your sons will grow up to be wife-beaters. If you tolerate a domineering man, your boys will grow up to believe that women are inferior. Wouldn't that be sad?
a real man doesn't need to hit to 'teach' his wife a lesson.as calm as i am,i dey always warn any guy (un)fortunate to date me dat d day u as much as tap my rosy cheeks in d name of slap,u go c fire.i WILL do as much as i possibly can to hurt u b4 quitting u for good. if its somone i dont really send,a couple of mopol guys will show u d way beating should b done.MEN to MAN.

Note to the women: if you tolerate a husband that beats you, your sons will grow up to be wife-beaters. If you tolerate a domineering man, your boys will grow up to believe that women are inferior.

gbam.

  Obama asks men to be better fathers than their own



Obama now cajoles men to be better fathers — not the kind who must be unearthed in the soul.


[size=14pt]"Let's admit to ourselves that there are a lot of men out there that need to stop acting like boys; [/size] who need to realize that responsibility does not end at conception; who need to know that what makes you a man is not the ability to have a child but the courage to raise a child."

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090621/ap_on_go_pr_wh/us_obama_fatherhood

being a good father and partner starts years before you even think of settling down, imo.

sad and sorry state of affairs is what we have today unfortunately.

@seun
Get married and experince first hand.

@all
Happy are those who marry one who loves and understands them, for there will be no violence.
Even the Bible acknowledges that there are spiteful women.
"A good wife is her husbands pride and joy ;but a wife who brings shame on her husband is like a cancer in his bones". proverbs 12;4
"Homes are made by the wisdom of women, but are destroyed by their foolishness", proverbs 14 ;1
"better to live on the roof than to share a house with a nagging wife", proverbs 21;9

My mum is the zonal leader of Catholic Women's Organisation and there was a time i was in naija on a visit. i stayed at my mum's and God, i heard so many things that my ears were full but a case interested me so much that i was glad i was still in Naija for the grand finale between the couple.
Mr A came to my mums one evening and complained to my mum to warn and advice his wife. they'd been married for 11 years and the man had never spoken one vile word to his wife nor even contemplated beating her.
He said he had taken her insults and nagging quietly for 11 years and his reason for coming to complain to my mum was this:
He had returned home from the shop, the previous day to find his children hungry and his wife absent. He went into the kitchen and cooked some beans for the kids and they had dinner. when the wife came back, he ignored her and went to bed because he didnt want to start a quarell.
In the morning, he went to his shop and then around noon, his wife came to his shop carrying THE POT OF BEANS he had cooked the previous evening.
She tongue lashed him in the market in the full glare of the public and showed them the pot of beans, saying he was a lousy cook and a disgrace. Imagine!!!
Mr A said he felt as if the ground should open and swallow him. What he had hidden from the public for 11 years had come out in the open. She had disgraced him beyond repair in his business area. He closed his shop and went straight to the church and wept. he stayed there till evening and then came to see my mum.

I just stood there in shock and disbelief. I had never seen a man who would take that kind of bullsh*t.
My mum thanked him for confiding in her and praised his restraint. She promised to talk to the wife, and she later did. Though i wasnt home when the wife came, i heard she claimed she had not finished dealing with her husband and that he would never dare raise a finger against her.

A week later, i had just returned from an outing and saw a woman wailing in my mum's living room. When i asked whats up, My mum just looked at me and said she's Mr. A's wife and he had thrown her out after slapping her around like Amitah Bachaan. I grinned and sat down to hear the full gist.

Guess what happened.
she assualted Mr. A's younger brother who came to see him and denied him entrance into their apartment. The brother did not retaliate. he just stood outside with the gathered crowd and waited for Mr A to return. on hearing what happened from both nieghbors and his brother, Mr. A sprang into action like a wounded lion.

Now, Seun if you had a wife like this(God forbid. its not your portion) what would have been your action?
this is a true story guys. i didnt make this up.