jidegirl12: @Nashville you beat me to it.... yes a registered beautiful non scary nanny will do all your work you think nobody but you is, as the matter of fact that your 9month crap duty would be done by a surrogate mom with your carbon copy kids .... Nobody is indispensable oh so watch it there .

So that man no be another person's pikin to make more money for you to spend just cause you're a woman?

You better face your studies sam Sam and aim high and let your man respect you and run after you .... Monè makes the world go round oh bebe!

For the records, I am a man. I have a wife who works and I believe a woman should add economic value to her family. Economic value in most cases is an income. But I have only made two points to note.

1. A working woman could be a liability if she disrepects and insults her husband and has no time for her family.
2. Cooking, cleaning, breas*tfeeding and love making are not the most important duties of a wife. A househelp can do all those. And when it comes to pregnancy, a woman cannot be pregnant all the time. She is probably pregant three times and thats it. What economic value is she going to add after that? Is it just cleaning, cooking etc? What if the children are in boarding school, where would be her value?

^^ I agree totally.

Nashville: OP,
You might make yourself happy, but half of the points you raised can be done by a house help or even machines. Cooking, washing cloths and keeping house clean can always be done by a nanny. So what if a woman does not have children. What does she do, since you claim women should be a home taking care of kids. And should a woman get a gold medal simply because she sleeps with her husband? Doesnt she not also enjoy the act or who else is supposed to sleep with him at night.

Anything of economic value is called an asset and liabilities can be described as debt or hindrances. A lady can be working (earning money) and still be a liability; examples are quarelsome wives who always find faults in their husbands, who insult and disrespect their husbands.

On the other hand a housewife can be an asset if she helps her husband, is a confidant, supports him in everyway she can and makes his home happy. There is economic value in that.

But the truth is than an asset is something with economic value. If all a woman does is clean, cook and sleeps with her husband, that is no value I am sorry. A househelp can do all of those. But the value comes in when you begin to be a source of strength and support. When you begin to take interest in things that pertain to him. When he sees you as his best friend and closest confidant. When he sees you and gets encouraged!

Thank God you know that a lady can be working and still be a big liability which is the bottom line of my point here. A woman's xter is more important than what she earns.
Will you employ a househelp to have kids for you? Wouldn't you rather have a legally married wife do that?
Btw, househelps are not liabilities because they relieve us of the strain and stress of house chores and taking care of the kids when we go to work. So it's not fair to call them liabilities.
And who says a non-working woman cannot be your best friend and confidante?
Who saysa she cannot pray for your success, and give you useful advice?
Most of you are defining liability as an economic term. You forget that the word has other general definitions, one of which I quoted in my first post.
A liability is basically a stumbling block, a hindrance a source of difficulty. How is it then fair to label a woman who does all the homely things I mentioned and more with these harsh words just and simply becasuse she's not employed?

This argument again Abeg let everyone do what works for their family.

I personally have to earn an income its just the way i am wired. However a woman who does not work in the FORMAL sense(cos there seems to be this misonception esp among naija guys that you must knack suit and 6 inch heels to be working ) MIGHT not be a financial liability.
I know someone who is a housewife(very derogatory term IMO)but hubby delegates alot of stuff too that he is unable to see to due to his 9 to 5 job.She is more less like an independent financial.advisor.I feel she is more an asset than the working class lady who feels her own money is for ferragamo,brazilian weave and aso ebi cos hubby is the man and must pay ALL the bills.And yes there are women like that.I have had friends say to me they chose the most expensive schools,apartments etc so that by the time he pays all the bills there is no money left for Sina(yoruba word for womanising).His money is ours and my money is mine.Those ARE liabilities(not saying u cant spend your money how u deem fit sha).

damiso: This argument again Abeg let everyone do what works for their family.

I personally have to earn an income its just the way i am wired. However a woman who does not work in the FORMAL sense(cos there seems to be this misonception esp among naija guys that you must knack suit and 6 inch heels to be working ) MIGHT not be a financial liability.
I know someone who is a housewife(very derogatory term IMO)but hubby delegates alot of stuff too that he is unable to see to due to his 9 to 5 job.She is more less like an independent financial.advisor.I feel she is more an asset than the working class lady who feels her own money is for ferragamo,brazilian weave and aso ebi cos hubby is the man and must pay ALL the bills.And yes there are women like that.I have had friends say to me they chose the most expensive schools,apartments etc so that by the time he pays all the bills there is no money left for Sina(yoruba word for womanising).His money is ours and my money is mine.Those ARE liabilities(not saying u cant spend your money how u deem fit sha).

Finally ooooooooo
Somebody who understands EXACTLY what Iv been struggling so hard to explain!
Whew!
The problem with them is that they are defining the word as an economic term alone and not as a general term!
I work in an office yes, but I'm also the chief economic adviser to my man. Something a non-working class woman can even do better because she has more time to give.
My point is that a woman's xter, virtues and ability to manage a home and money should be a man's foremost priority when looking for a wife.

Poster, what is traditional duties? Apart from pregnancy and labour? Please you are not doing any woman any favour with your argument. Most women are trying to break free from the so - called traditional duties.

Woman, it is your fault. If you allow your hubby to ri e fin it is your damn fault. If your man 'demands' that you stay at home as long as you didn't drag him huffing and puffing to the alter,then he can be a house husband if he wants. Please empower yourself woman and get something doing.

vanitty: Poster, what is traditional duties? Apart from pregnancy and labour? Please you are not doing any woman any favour with your argument. Most women are trying to break free from the so - called traditional duties.

Woman, it is your fault. If you allow your hubby to ri e fin it is your damn fault. If your man 'demands' that you stay at home as long as you didn't drag him huffing and puffing to the alter,then he can be a house husband if he wants. Please empower yourself woman and get something doing.

When I said tradition duties, I meant their core duties. Their main duties. I didn't say that a woman should not work o! Didn't you see where I wrote that I work?

Sweetlemon:
Finally ooooooooo
Somebody who understands EXACTLY what Iv been struggling so hard to explain!
Whew!
The problem with them is that they are defining the word as an economic term alone and not as a general term!
I work in an office yes, but I'm also the chief economic adviser to my man. Something a non-working class woman can even do better because she has more time to give.
My point is that a woman's xter, virtues and ability to manage a home and money should be a man's foremost priority when looking for a wife.

We understand your point, but what we are trying to tell you is that the qualities you mentioned in your original post does not make a woman an asset. Sleeping with your husband and being able to have kids does not make you an asset. Cooking, cleaning and washinig does not make you an asset either. A woman should bring more value to a marriage than a house help. When some husbands treat their wives like househelps you may not blame them. While it is absolutely wrong to maltreat ones wife, but if all a woman does in a marriage is cook, wash, clean and sex, dont be surprised if you husband starts treating you anyhow cos you are not an asset!

Nashville:

We understand your point, but what we are trying to tell you is that the qualities you mentioned in your original post does not make a woman an asset. Sleeping with your husband and being able to have kids does not make you an asset. Cooking, cleaning and washinig does not make you an asset either. A woman should bring more value to a marriage than a house help. When some husbands treat their wives like househelps you may not blame them. While it is absolutely wrong to maltreat ones wife, but if all a woman does in a marriage is cook, wash, clean and sex, dont be surprised if you husband starts treating you anyhow cos you are not an asset!

Please go through my first post again, precisely where I listed the traditional (main) duties of a wife. You guys were just carried away with the need to prove that a non-working woman is a financial liability.

OP i think you might have to redefine the roles of a wife as maybe childrearing,homekeeping and s...ex might not necessarily be a good argument for not being a liability.Same as the question"Does she have a job?" is not doing some guys any favours.Its not just having a job its what is her outlook to life that should be more of a concern.

Sweetlemon:
Please go through my first post again, precisely where I listed the traditional (main) duties of a wife. You guys were just carried away with the need to prove that a non-working woman is a financial liability.

Sorry most of those "traditional duties" you listed does not make a wife an asset. What is even more funny about your original post is that you mentioned that rather than men complaining about their non-working wives, they should work harder to make more money. So if a husband is not making enough and his wife sits at home cooking and cleaning, your advice to them is that the man should work harder. Sorry to say, but you are very traditional.

damiso: OP i think you might have to redefine the roles of a wife as maybe childrearing,homekeeping and s...ex might not necessarily be a good argument for not being a liability.Same as the question"Does she have a job?" is not doing some guys any favours.Its not just having a job its what is her outlook to life that should be more of a concern.

I explained everything clearly in my first and subsequent posts. I don't know why people are not seeing where I keep writing about the home and money management skills some stay at home wives/moms have. I wrote countlessly that some wives can actually lead their husbands to great wealth by being a best friend, finacial and general life-issues advisor, and confidante to him.

Sweetlemon: Debosky, thank God you realize that there is one thing a non-working wife can do that you can NEVER do. Not even in the year 3000!
Like I said, you still don't get my point.

I also dont think a woman has the ability to make herself pregnant so the point about men not able to get pregnant is very MOOT

jidegirl12: @Nashville you beat me to it.... yes a registered beautiful non scary nanny will do all your work you think nobody but you can't , as the matter of fact that your 9month crap duty would be done by a surrogate mom with your carbon copy kids .... Nobody is indispensable oh so watch it there .

So that man no be another person's pikin to make more money for you to spend just cause you're a woman?

You better face your studies sam Sam and aim high and let your man respect you and run after you .... Monè makes the world go round oh bebe!

I already liked this post.

So because God made you a woman the thing between your legs should feed you for life?

Or if the womans husband dies, wont she find a way to survive

Traditional role of women

How many people live the traditional way?

You want to be a traditional housewife yet you dont sweep with brooms, You have washing machines, You dont go to market to sell, You dont wash plates with hand. So what are the traditional responsibilities of the wife?

To bear kids? So you mean any woman who cant bear kids is useless?

You bear kids for how many years of your married life?

If you are not married, what are your plans for feeding yourself if I may Ask?

Any woman who doesnt contribute to the house (Unless she is in school, sick laid off or mandated by husband not to) is a liability. SIMPLE

Sweetlemon:

When I said tradition duties, I meant their core duties. Their main duties. I didn't say that a woman should not work o! Didn't you see where I wrote that I work?

I understand you perfectly. However, I am just saying that apart from pregnancy and labour, there isn't any core duties designated for a woman.

You see the problem arises during the courting stages when a woman does ALL the cooking, cleaning for the boyfriend and of course the man will expect that to continue after marriage and I don't blame him, isn't that deception ni? Women should stop engaging in this fraudulent activity to become missus. Follow through all your natural life with the cooking, cleaning or set the boundaries before you say I do.

dayokanu:

I also dont think a woman has the ability to make herself pregnant so the point about men not able to get pregnant is very MOOT

A woman cannot impregnate herself but like I said earlier, where it comes to child bearing, a woman does much more work than the man.

Sperm+eggs=feotus.........equation balance 1:1
Where does the feotus grow before it can be born? 1:2
Who bears the pregnancy wahala? 1:3
Who goes through the labour pains? 1:4
Who breastfeeds and spends most time nuturing the baby? 1:5

@lemon whatever you are like that knucklehead Biolabee used to say: 'you're a learner', just shut it will ya? I don laugh tire for here.

Shove your yeye equation wherever that suit you, you're just a plastic lazy bone who wants to spend her own money on her self solely and hide under labor pains and drinking donut & bournvita after child birth and call it a duty.

You crack me up, my employee thot I'm going cookoo laughing out loud over a Nigerian site

Can you imagine?

@Dayo thank you for liking my post, o ya e oh.

Sweetlemon:
A woman cannot impregnate herself but like I said earlier, where it comes to child bearing, a woman does much more work than the man.

Sperm+eggs=feotus.........equation balance 1:1
Where does the feotus grow before it can be born? 1:2
Who bears the pregnancy wahala? 1:3
Who goes through the labour pains? 1:4
Who breastfeeds and spends most time nuturing the baby? 1:5

Women who work contribute financially to their house, Dont they have eggs, or are they excused from labour pains?

Moreover if these are the reasons a woman doesnt want to work she can tell the husband upfront she doesnt want to have kids and they can both know their options

Most women want to have kids and desire it a lot. To now hope to get compensated and fed for life because you did what you always prayed for

Go Redeemed Camp and see women who even want to experience those birth pains, pregnancy labour etc for even 1 month alone

And now one wants to sit at home because she did what she always prayed to do since her youth

I actually think you are doing women a disservice here. Or how else can you expect to be compensated for sleeping with your own husband

Any woman who wants to be an ALABODO is free to . Millions of women worldwide are earning money and still performing their duties as mothers and wives

Alabodo

. . .Never stops cracking me up.

The image it evokes is enough to make any woman thinking of staying at home change her mind.

jidegirl12: @lemon whatever you are like that knucklehead Biolabee used to say: 'you're a learner', just shut it will ya? I don laugh tire for here.

Shove your yeye equation wherever that suit you, you're just a plastic lazy bone who wants to spend her own money on her self solely and hide under labor pains and drinking donut & bournvita after child birth and call it a duty.

You crack me up, my employee thot I'm going cookoo laughing out loud over a Nigerian site

Can you imagine?

Lol @ your funny assessment of my points. Like you didn't see where I stressed that woman's xter is more important than her income.
Women like you work mostly because they want to form "working class chics" and carry their noses in the air! Some carry the working class woman banner because they want men to find them more "wifeable". Lol!
Well, you have a right to your opinion but don't make another person feel bad just because she's not working even though she's the best friend, confidante, and financial advisor to her hubby.
Monetary contribution is not even up to half of what it takes to have a happy marriage

Sweetlemon:
Lol @ your funny assessment of my points. Like you didn't see where I said I stressed that woman's xter is more important than her income.
Women like you work mostly because they want to prove to form "working class chics" and carry their noses in the air! Some carry the working class woman banner because they want men to find them more "wifeable". Lol!
Well, you have a right to your opinion but don't make another person feel bad just because she's not working even though she's the best friend, confidante, and financial advisor to her hubby.
[b]Monetary contribution is not even up to half of what it takes to have a happy marriag[/b]e

Mtcheww ....yeye n baka!

You want to stash your own earning in a seperate account because you experienced child birth and wash dishes and spend his own money on you all ? OLE!

I'm outta here jare!

So if these women are not married how would they be feeding themselves?

Once they got married, they suddenly became disabled and cant work to even feed themselves again

So whats the purpose of now educating the girl child when its to perform traditional roles?

You spend $100k plus incurring student loans for you to sit at home washing plates(In most cases supervising househelps washing plates)

The parents should sue her for wasting their money

This girl is shouting character all over the place - na only woman get character?

Ok I have good character but earn no money. Please will you marry me?

It is not a crime to be a financial liability, heck it can be a family choice. But don't try to sugarcoat it as something else. If you went to school, did a degree etc. with sole the aim of giving birth to kids then you're not only a liability, you've wasted your parents' funds.

debosky: This girl is shouting character all over the place - na only woman get character?

Ok I have good character but earn no money. Please will you marry me?

Abi ooo. So if a man has character alone but not making money is he an asset to the marriage?

debosky: This girl is shouting character all over the place - na only woman get character?

Ok I have good character but earn no money. Please will you marry me?

It is not a crime to be a financial liability, heck it can be a family choice. But don't try to sugarcoat it as something else. If you went to school, did a degree etc. with sole the aim of giving birth to kids then you're not only a liability, you've wasted your parents' funds.

You are a man and your main duty is to provide so you HAVE to work.

Sweetlemon:
You are a man and your main duty is to provide so you HAVE to work.

Traditionally a woman is not supposed to go to school but stay in the Kitchen? Would you accept that for your daughters and yourself?

Whats the womans main duty? Are you saying a woman who cant have kids is a failure?

Sweetlemon:
You are a man and your main duty is to provide so you HAVE to work.

Jide correctly diagnozed you. This is the voice of "a plastic lazy bone who wants to spend her own money on her self solely and hide under labor pains and drinking donut & bournvita after child birth and call it a duty."

jidegirl12: @Nashville you beat me to it.... yes a registered beautiful non scary nanny will do all your work you think nobody but you can't , as the matter of fact that your 9month crap duty would be done by a surrogate mom with your carbon copy kids .... Nobody is indispensable oh so watch it there .

So that man no be another person's pikin to make more money for you to spend just cause you're a woman?

You better face your studies sam Sam and aim high and let your man respect you and run after you .... Monè makes the world go round oh bebe!

funny and true

chaircover: How about if she has the best character but the husband ends up dying from a heart attack from working himself to death just to sustain his family because wifey wont work and relieve him from his financial burden

This childbirth we are talking about, 9 months pregnancy and a few hours labour is more than worth all the years of joy and love that child will give us. If anything its the men I feel sorry for, because they are the ones splitting guts to provide for these same children but most times the children tend to love their mums and are more close to their mums.

Many many men still go to work and come home and do chores, look after baby etc. There is no you and me anymore. Roles have merged and its a partnership and so if there is any woman out there sitting at home praying while her husband is out there killing & stressing himself to maintain his family, his extended family and her extended family on top because she doesn't have her own income, then she is a bad liability wife digging an early grave for her husband period.

not trying to husband you, but I love you.

Sexylemon:
You are a man and your main duty is to provide so you HAVE to work.

^^This statement is a disgrace to the smart intelligent women demanding gender quality. OP, if i was a woman, i'd be so ashamed of you right now.

Sweetlemon:
Lol!
Go joor!

This singular reply shows your arguments have been successfully dismantled and you have nothing more to support your assertions. Ergo, stay-at-home wives are liabilities.

Q.E.D