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Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego - Jokes Etc (5) - Nairaland

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akpos funniest joke, and more. / 24/7 Nigeria Jokes Update / Real Funny Nigeria Jokes (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by EzekielNnamdi(m): 10:30pm On Sep 23, 2013
njuwo: A wife
went on holiday
leaving the husband
behind. The husband
got so Hot one day
that he decided to try the maid who
had just come from
Nsukka village and who
seemed clever. ... He
called the maid to his
bedroom where he had taken off his pants,
he
pointed to his manhood
when the maid arrived.
Husband: Do you know
what this is?
Maid: (actin Shy) Yes Husband: Do you know
what it s for?
Maid:Yes
Husband: show me. The
maid immediately
dropped to her knees held the item with both
hands
drew
closer and opened her
mouth. The husband
was shivering with anticipation . The maid
then began,"My name is
Chinasa , I'm 23 years
old and I'm from
Nsukka. I
want to make a shout- out to my parents,mr
and mrs Chigozie, my
uncle, Broda
NnamdI aka' chop my
money and MY auntY,
MRS IFEOMA, I would also
like to tell my boyfriend
Johnny that I miss him.
Can u play me Ashawo
by Flavour Nabania?"
Then finally says to the man," Oga,take your
microphone I'm
through...
njuwo: A wife
went on holiday
leaving the husband
behind. The husband
got so Hot one day
that he decided to try the maid who
had just come from
Nsukka village and who
seemed clever. ... He
called the maid to his
bedroom where he had taken off his pants,
he
pointed to his manhood
when the maid arrived.
Husband: Do you know
what this is?
Maid: (actin Shy) Yes Husband: Do you know
what it s for?
Maid:Yes
Husband: show me. The
maid immediately
dropped to her knees held the item with both
hands
drew
closer and opened her
mouth. The husband
was shivering with anticipation . The maid
then began,"My name is
Chinasa , I'm 23 years
old and I'm from
Nsukka. I
want to make a shout- out to my parents,mr
and mrs Chigozie, my
uncle, Broda
NnamdI aka' chop my
money and MY auntY,
MRS IFEOMA, I would also
like to tell my boyfriend
Johnny that I miss him.
Can u play me Ashawo
by Flavour Nabania?"
Then finally says to the man," Oga,take your
microphone I'm
through...
njuwo: A wife
went on holiday
leaving the husband
behind. The husband
got so Hot one day
that he decided to try the maid who
had just come from
Nsukka village and who
seemed clever. ... He
called the maid to his
bedroom where he had taken off his pants,
he
pointed to his manhood
when the maid arrived.
Husband: Do you know
what this is?
Maid: (actin Shy) Yes Husband: Do you know
what it s for?
Maid:Yes
Husband: show me. The
maid immediately
dropped to her knees held the item with both
hands
drew
closer and opened her
mouth. The husband
was shivering with anticipation . The maid
then began,"My name is
Chinasa , I'm 23 years
old and I'm from
Nsukka. I
want to make a shout- out to my parents,mr
and mrs Chigozie, my
uncle, Broda
NnamdI aka' chop my
money and MY auntY,
MRS IFEOMA, I would also
like to tell my boyfriend
Johnny that I miss him.
Can u play me Ashawo
by Flavour Nabania?"
Then finally says to the man," Oga,take your
microphone I'm
through...

1 Like

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by Suigenerisshegs(m): 7:05am On Sep 24, 2013
Kindly ff @suigenerisshegz on twitter,I follow back. Heart crossed.
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by nodawa(m): 10:01am On Sep 24, 2013
Laugh away your sorrow

A lady's upper body has B - Blouse, Bra, BooBs.
Lower body has P - Panties, Pus*y ... Tell me why will men not suffer from High BP!?! lol
laugh it out

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 10:47am On Sep 24, 2013
Police : Knock knock
Akpos : Who is knocking?
Police : Police
Akpos : What do you want?
Police : To talk
Akpos : How many are you?
Police : We are 2
Akpos : Talk to each other then.

20 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by Tollsyn(m): 3:35pm On Sep 24, 2013
njuwo: Three business associates, an Igbo man, a
Yoruba man and a Chinese man, went to eat
lunch together at a restaurant in Surulere.
While in the middle of their meal, a fly came in
through the window. It flew across the table
to where the Igbo man was but he just
waved his hands to chase it away.
The fly then went to where the Yoruba man
was, he also chased it away.
Finally, the fly then went to where the Chinese
man was and was flying close to his ears. The
Chinese man looked at the fly for sometime
and then grabbed it, put it in his mouth and
swallowed it.
The other men saw this but just kept on
eating.
About Five minutes later, another fly came in
and flew to the Yoruba man who just chased
it away again.
It then flew on to the Igbo man but this time
he did not chase the fly, he looked at it for
sometime and then grabbed it. He then
turned to the Chinese man and asked "how
much you go buy am?"
ROTFL Hahahahahaha
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by Tollsyn(m): 3:39pm On Sep 24, 2013
njuwo: John: bby am gonna tell u a story
with 4 parts. Remember that, 4 parts
Grace: alryt love
John: okay am gonna start wth part 1.
There was a husband n a wife, they
were driving to a camp site wen they
came upon a split road. The husband
says "lets take the left one. The wife
say i thnk we shuld take the right
road." The husband slaps the wife
across the face "whose driving me or
u?" and they took the left path.
Grace: hahahahaha..
John: now am gonna tell u part 2.
Once they got to the camp the
husband goes fishing so his wife can
cook dinner. He comes back and the
wife says "good now i can cook fish
soup for us to eat." The husband says
"but i wanna eat fried fish." The wife
slaps the husband n says "who is
cooking me or u?" and the ended up
drinking fish soup.
Grace: oh crap! Hahaha
John: now am gonna tell u part 4.
Grace: wat abt part 3?
John: (landed grace a hot slap on the
face) who is telling the story me or
u?
Lmfao

2 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 4:16pm On Sep 24, 2013
Ochuko was burnt to death so they called
his 2 best frnds Ofego and Akpos to identify
the body.
1st went Ofego...
Ofego: He's burnt pretty bad his face is
beyond recognition
'Ofego asked the motician to roll the body
over'..
The motician found this really weird..
He rolled the body then Ofego said ' that
aint Ochuko!
They calld his 2nd frnd Akpos to identify the
body.. '
Akpos also askd the same
question to roll the body over' he also said
this is not Ochuko!
The motician askd why did both of u
wanted me to roll the body?
Akpos: Ochuko has 2 assholes ..dats not
Ochuko..
Motician: huh dats impossible!
Akpos: I'm telling u he got 2 assholes cos
evrytime wen three of us go to the Club
people say ''Here comes Ochuko and his
two assholes!''

18 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 7:22pm On Sep 24, 2013
My People As Blackberry ate all
my money, I got angry and sold it and then
took some money from it to buy China
phone! Now am in bigger trouble!!!
1. It gets full after 3 minutes of
charging.
2. The phone has TV, Touch
screen,Nail cutter, firelighter etc.
3. Text message can be written with a
toothpick.
4. There are some spelling
mistakes e.g NokLa, blackderry,
i-porn, samswag etc.
5. When an aeroplane passes by
it records "one missed call".
6. When a big truck hoots; it
records"charger connected".
7. When a Chinese man passes
by you it says "one Bluetooth
device found"
8. When a fine boy/girl passes by
u, it says "Ur favourite food
found"
9. When an ugly boy/girl passes,
it says, "Virus detected".
Please, I want to sell it!
Who wants to buy o?

8 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 9:56am On Sep 25, 2013
Akpos has been admiring
his neighbour’s wife. The neighbour’s wife
always gives him this seductive smile
whenever they greet each other. Akpos
didn’t know how to approach the lady to tell her of his desires … because she’s married.
So, one day the lady herself approached
Akpos alone in his apartment.
AKPOS: Hi.
LADY: Hi.
AKPOS: Is everything
alright?
… LADY: Yes. Just need little
help from you (Smiling seductively).
AKPOS: Wow! Anything for
the angel.
LADY: I…I…I…just don’t
know how to say this. I’ll be so
ashamed of myself if I ask and you say no.
AKPOS: Oh my lady. you
don’t have to. I am ready to do
anything for you.
LADY: You know, it’s been over 3 weeks since my husband travelled…
AKPOS: Yes! Yes! Yes!
LADY: And even when he’s
around, he has some… (pause for a while) he
has some disabilities… AKPOS: Oh poor you… You must have been going through hell!
LADY: I know you’ll be
stronger than him…
AKPOS: Sure.
LADY: Can you help me?
AKPORS: Wow! Now? Sure,
I’m ready if you are ready.
LADY: Oh thanks
goodness! that’s why I came to you. Can you
help me carry our deep freezer from our kitchen to the next street for repairs?

17 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by omonnakoda: 2:19pm On Sep 25, 2013
An Arab diplomat visiting the U.S. for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The Grand Emir was unused to the salt in American foods (french fries, cheeses, salami, anchovies etc.) and was constantly sending his manservant Abdul to fetch him a glass of water. Time and again, Abdul would scamper off and return with a glass of water, but then came the time when he returned empty-handed. Abdul, you son of an ugly camel, where is my water? demanded the Grand Emir. A thousand pardons, O Illustrious One, stammered the wretched Abdul, white man sit on well.

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 3:03pm On Sep 25, 2013
Akpos had an accident with his new BMW
X6.
He manage 2 get up and called a police
officer and said: ”this man just came and
smash off my BMW.
My 6 million naira car is now condemned”.
The police officer shook his head in
amazement and said: “You Akpos, you are
so
materialistic. You didn’t even realise that
your hand had
been cut off”.
Akpos looked at his amputated hand and
screamed: “Oh my God, where is my gold
wrist watch

13 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 5:24pm On Sep 25, 2013
5 people named Crazy, Mad, Sun, Fool and
Imposible were living in the same house.
On a certain afternoon, Sun came home and
rushed to the kitchen to prepare some
lunch
since it was his duty.
…
Imposible was bathing in the shower, Crazy
was just relaxing in the living room but Mad
and Fool had gone outside to do some
house
shopping.
After he finished cooking, Sun left the gas
running without noticing. After sometime,
the
whole kitchen was on fire!
Crazy decided to call the Fireservice:-
Crazy: Hallo? is that the fire service?
Fire service: Yes pliz, how can we help you?
Crazy: We need your help immediately, our
house was accidentally set on fire by Sun!
Fire service: Set on fire by sun? thats
impossible!
Crazy: No! its not him, he was just having a
shower when all this took place!
Fire service: Are you mad?
Crazy: No! Mad has gone to the market to do
some shopping…
Fire service: Dont be a fool!
Crazy: I swear am not Fool! he went out to
the
market with mad…
Fire service: Hey man, you must be crazy!
Crazy: Yeah exactly! thats me. pliz do
something immediately and help us put off
this fire!
Fire service: ¤¤HANGS UP THE CALL¤¤

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 5:25pm On Sep 25, 2013
5 people named Crazy, Mad, Sun, Fool and
Imposible were living in the same house.
On a certain afternoon, Sun came home and
rushed to the kitchen to prepare some
lunch
since it was his duty.
…
Imposible was bathing in the shower, Crazy
was just relaxing in the living room but Mad
and Fool had gone outside to do some
house
shopping.
After he finished cooking, Sun left the gas
running without noticing. After sometime,
the
whole kitchen was on fire!
Crazy decided to call the Fireservice:-
Crazy: Hallo? is that the fire service?
Fire service: Yes pliz, how can we help you?
Crazy: We need your help immediately, our
house was accidentally set on fire by Sun!
Fire service: Set on fire by sun? thats
impossible!
Crazy: No! its not him, he was just having a
shower when all this took place!
Fire service: Are you mad?
Crazy: No! Mad has gone to the market to do
some shopping…
Fire service: Dont be a fool!
Crazy: I swear am not Fool! he went out to
the
market with mad…
Fire service: Hey man, you must be crazy!
Crazy: Yeah exactly! thats me. pliz do
something immediately and help us put off
this fire!
Fire service: ¤¤HANGS UP THE CALL¤¤

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 8:29pm On Sep 25, 2013
Akpos was caught red handed by his principal writing MAY GOD PUNISH MY PRINCIPAL.

Principal: What nonsense are you writing? (about to Slap Akpos).

Akpos: Sir, i have not finish it.

Principal: (angry) what do you mean? You are insulting me and you are saying you have not finish.

Akpos: This is not what i wanted to write.

Principal: So what did you want to write?

Akpos: I wanted to write that MAY GOD PUNISH MY PRINCIPAL’S ENEMY.

12 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 8:14am On Sep 26, 2013
Chinese couple living in Lagos gave birth to a
black baby.
In anger, husband asked the wife....
"Chu, why baby black?"
She replied, "we live in Nigeria, no
electricity.....me hot, u hot, s*x hot.....baby
burnt!"

15 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 9:28am On Sep 26, 2013
Read this "HATE letter". It is so funny and
creative.
This is a love letter from a boy to a girl....
However, the girl's father does not like him
and want them stop their relationship...
...and
so..the boy wrote this letter to the girl..he
knows that the girl's father will definitely
read this letter..
1 "The great love that I have for you
2 is gone, and I find my dislike for you
3 grows every day. When I see you,
4 I do not even like your face;
5 the one thing that I want to do is to
6 look at other girls. I never wanted to
7 marry you. Our last conversation
8 was very boring and has not
9 made me look forward to seeing you
again.
10 You think only of yourself.
11 If we were married, I know that I would
find
12 life very difficult, and I would have no
13 pleasure in living with you. I have a heart
14 to give, but it is not something that
15 I want to give to you. No one is more
16 foolish and selfish than you, and you are
not
17 able to care for me and help me.
18 I sincerely want you to understand that
19 I speak the truth. You will do me a favor
20 if you think this is the end. Do not try
21 to answer this. Your letters are full of
22 things that do not interest me. You have
no
23 true love for me. Good-bye! Believe me,
24 I do not care for you. Please do not think
that
25 I am still your boyfriend."
So bad!! However, before handing over the
letter to the girl, the boy told the girl to
"READ BETWEEN THE LINES", meaning-only to
read
1.3.5.7.9.11.13 .15.17.19.21.23 .25. (Odd
Numbers) So..Please try reading it again! It's
so smart & sweet....
LIKE FOR MORE!

40 Likes 7 Shares

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 11:48am On Sep 26, 2013
During an argument, a HUSBAND told his
WIFE, "women are just DONKEYS. All women
are DONKEYS!"
The next day as they were travelling along the
highway, a donkey crosses right in front of
their car.
The WIFE tells her HUSBAND, "Sweetheart, be
careful. Your mother is crossing the road."

12 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 1:39pm On Sep 26, 2013
Woman Buys A New SimCard, Puts it In Her Phone and Decides 2 Surprise her Husband Who Is seated On the Couch In The Living Room... She Goes To The Kitchen, Calls Her Husband With the New Number: "Hello Darling" The Husband Responds in A Low Tone: "Let Me Call U Back Later honey, The Dumb Lady Is In The Kitchen.

8 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by peterkul(m): 3:00pm On Sep 26, 2013
@proflakaz_: You are doing twitter wrong if you ain't following the funniest comedian on here. Go make it right, follow @yorfedenor

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 5:07pm On Sep 26, 2013
A Married man Went for Confession, and Said To His Priest;

Man: I Almost Had An Affair With Another Woman.

Priest: What Do You Mean, Almost?

Man: Well, We Got Undressed And Rubbed Together, But Then I Stopped myself.

Priest: Rubbing Together Is The Same As Putting It In. You are Not To See That Woman Again. For Your Penance, Say Five Hail Mary’s And Put N5000 In The Poor Box.

The man Left The Confessional, Said His Prayers, And Then Walked Over To The Poor Box. He Paused For A Moment And Then Started To Leave. The Priest, Who Was Watching, Quickly Ran Over To Him and said; I Saw That you Didn’t Put Any Money In The Poor Box!. The man Replied; Yes, But I Rubbed The N5000 On The Box, And According To You, That is The Same As Putting It In!

12 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 6:29pm On Sep 26, 2013
AKPOS & HIS NEW ONLINE CHICK!!!
Akpos: Hi babe, wasup?
Girl: i'm cool thanks!
Akpos: u're welcm, i'll like 2 knw u wella
Girl: i'm Tichick, 19, slim & dark from Lasgidi.
Akpos: babe u're the kind of girl i like.
Akpos continues: babe actually, my name is
James
Ovie Akpororo but my friends call me Akpos.
I am 59 years old, I live in No16 Church street,
Oshodi, Lagos. I have a supermarket @12
Femi Johnson street, Mushin, Lagos. Babe i
like
dating young girls like you. You can call me on
08028264598...
Girl: but oga u're a family man. How will ur
wife & daughter feel if they see me with u. Or
don't u think its wrong?
Akpos: babe dont even mention my useless
daughter & her wayward mother here.
They're on their own & i have my life to live.
Girl: its ok then. But do u care to know more
about me?
Akpos: babe give me ur full detail including ur
bank account number
Girl: well, my full name is Augustina James
Akpororo, i'm a primary 6 student of Gov't
School. my mum's name is Gladys Akpororo,
she sell fish @mushin. My father's
name is James Ovie Akpororo, he is a
gateman @oshodi where we both live.
Akpos: Tina, so it is you!
Girl: Papa, so it is you!
Akpos: Your mother must hear this
Girl: Papa, mama is here o.

11 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 6:29pm On Sep 26, 2013
AKPOS & HIS NEW ONLINE CHICK!!!
Akpos: Hi babe, wasup?
Girl: i'm cool thanks!
Akpos: u're welcm, i'll like 2 knw u wella
Girl: i'm Tichick, 19, slim & dark from Lasgidi.
Akpos: babe u're the kind of girl i like.
Akpos continues: babe actually, my name is
James
Ovie Akpororo but my friends call me Akpos.
I am 59 years old, I live in No16 Church street,
Oshodi, Lagos. I have a supermarket @12
Femi Johnson street, Mushin, Lagos. Babe i
like
dating young girls like you. You can call me on
08028264598...
Girl: but oga u're a family man. How will ur
wife & daughter feel if they see me with u. Or
don't u think its wrong?
Akpos: babe dont even mention my useless
daughter & her wayward mother here.
They're on their own & i have my life to live.
Girl: its ok then. But do u care to know more
about me?
Akpos: babe give me ur full detail including ur
bank account number
Girl: well, my full name is Augustina James
Akpororo, i'm a primary 6 student of Gov't
School. my mum's name is Gladys Akpororo,
she sell fish @mushin. My father's
name is James Ovie Akpororo, he is a
gateman @oshodi where we both live.
Akpos: Tina, so it is you!
Girl: Papa, so it is you!
Akpos: Your mother must hear this
Girl: Papa, mama is here o.

3 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 6:30pm On Sep 26, 2013
AKPOS & HIS NEW ONLINE CHICK!!!
Akpos: Hi babe, wasup?
Girl: i'm cool thanks!
Akpos: u're welcm, i'll like 2 knw u wella
Girl: i'm Tichick, 19, slim & dark from Lasgidi.
Akpos: babe u're the kind of girl i like.
Akpos continues: babe actually, my name is
James
Ovie Akpororo but my friends call me Akpos.
I am 59 years old, I live in No16 Church street,
Oshodi, Lagos. I have a supermarket @12
Femi Johnson street, Mushin, Lagos. Babe i
like
dating young girls like you. You can call me on
08028264598...
Girl: but oga u're a family man. How will ur
wife & daughter feel if they see me with u. Or
don't u think its wrong?
Akpos: babe dont even mention my useless
daughter & her wayward mother here.
They're on their own & i have my life to live.
Girl: its ok then. But do u care to know more
about me?
Akpos: babe give me ur full detail including ur
bank account number
Girl: well, my full name is Augustina James
Akpororo, i'm a primary 6 student of Gov't
School. my mum's name is Gladys Akpororo,
she sell fish @mushin. My father's
name is James Ovie Akpororo, he is a
gateman @oshodi where we both live.
Akpos: Tina, so it is you!
Girl: Papa, so it is you!
Akpos: Your mother must hear this
Girl: Papa, mama is here o.

2 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 7:18pm On Sep 26, 2013
A girl invited her boyfriend (Akpos) over for
dinner in her house so he could meet her
parents. While they were eating, it started
raining heavily, so the girl's mother
said;"Akpos, i think you
should sleep over here because the rain
shows no sign of stopping anytime soon"
After eating, the mom went to the toilet and
the father went to sleep while the girl went
to
the kitchen to clean the plates. When the girl
and her mother returned to the sitting
room,
Akpos was not there, they checked all over
the house and did not find him. As they
were wondering what happened to him, he
walked
back into the house, wet and soaked with a
plastic bag.
Girl's mother: Where were you and why are
you so wet?
Akpos: I went home to get my pyjamas.

13 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 7:13am On Sep 27, 2013
Akpos' friend, Ochuko, was
giving his wife the beating of her life, & the
woman kept shouting for
help. Luckily Akpos came in,
the woman was so happy thinking she has
gotten
a helper.
Akpos said to Ochuko, "You
don't beat women these
days, you only need to marry
a 2nd wife, you hear!" Ochuko's wife
screamed
on top of her voice, "Honey!
Don't listen to him, CONTINUE
BEATING ME!!".

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 9:13am On Sep 27, 2013
Jonathan met with the Queen of
England. He asked her, "How do you
run such an efficient
government? Are there any tips u can
give to me?
I want to help Nigeria." "Well," said the Queen,
"the most important thing
is to surround yourself with intelligent
people." Jonathan frowned, and then
asked,"But how do i
know the people around me are really
intelligent?" The Queen replied, "Oh, that's
easy, you just ask
them to answer an intelligent riddle."
The Queen
pushed a button on her intercom.
"Please send
David Cameron in here, would you?" David
Cameron walked into the room
and
said,"Yes, your majesty?" The Queen
smiled and said, "Answer this riddle.
David, your mother and father have a
child, it is not your brother and it is not your
sister. Who is
it?" Without pausing for a minute David
Cameron answered, "that would be
me." "Yes, very good," said the Queen.
Jonathan went back home to ask his Vice
President Sambo. JONATHAN: Answer
this. Your mother and your
father have a child, it's not your brother
and it's
not your sister, who is it? SAMBO: "I'm not
sure, let me get back to you." He
asked all his staff in the Office but none
could
give him an answer. Finally, one day, VP
Sambo
ran into Dora Akunyili. Sambo asked, Dora,
SAMBO: Your mother and father
have a child and
it's not your brother or sister, who is
it?" Dora answered sharply, "That's
easy, its me!"
Sambo smiled,and said "Thanks!" Then he
went back to speak with President
Jonathan. Sambo: Sir, I have the answer
to that riddle, It's
Dora Akunyili! Jonathan got angry,he
said to Sambo. "No
wonder Nigeria isn't moving forward, I am
surrounded by Dummies! The answer is
David
Cameron!" WHO IS MORE INTELLIGENT?

10 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 10:56am On Sep 27, 2013
It happened in a hospital in Warri, Delta State ... Intensive Care Unit (ICU) patients died, in the same bed, every Sunday at 3pm. Doctors thought it was something supernatural. So, a team of experts was formed to Investigate the cause or causes. The following Sunday, few minutes before 3pm, all doctors & Nurses stood around that particular bed waiting to see what it was. Then suddenly Akpos (Part time sweeper) entered the ICU, unplugged the Life Support system of that Bed & then plugged his blackberry charger.

17 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 1:34pm On Sep 27, 2013
Akpos wrote a test and a week later the teacher gave the test papers back.
On Akpos' test paper he wrote 'I D I O T!'.
Akpos goes to the teacher and said: "you were meant to give me a grade and not write your signature!"

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 3:06pm On Sep 27, 2013
Akpos : Papa when i go to Heaven, I will ask
mama why she died so Untimely.
Papa : What if she is in hell?
Akpos : Ah Papa! You will then have to ask
her.

8 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 4:06pm On Sep 27, 2013
Teacher : If your father has N10, and you
asked for N5, how much will your father
have?.
Akpos: N10.
Teacher : You don't know maths. Akpos : You
dont know my father!

9 Likes

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 7:03pm On Sep 27, 2013
Akpos and his babe papa......
General: Hello! May I know you?
Caller (Akpos): sorri I want to
speak wit Joy sir.
General: I said who are u & what
for?
Akpos: hmmm (after he
understood d situation @ hand),
Okay Sir, I am FRANK EDOHO
from WHO WANTS TO BE A
MILLIONAIRE. Joy's friend is
presently on hot seat and needs
her help to answer a question for
2Million Naira. So the next voice
you hear after is her's, the time
starts now....... General: ooh am
very sorry!!! Joy! ,Joy!! Pls take ur
phone ur friend needs ur
help...........
Akpos: The question is, when are
you coming tomorrow? A.
Morning, B. Afternoon, C.Evening,
D. Night.
Joy: D. Night.
Akpos: Are you sure? Final
answer?.... Joy: yes am very sure!
Akpos: okay, greet that yeye
father of urs for me

7 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by Diamondxy(f): 11:49am On Sep 28, 2013
njuwo: DIFFERENCE BTW A FOREIGN ADVICE AND A
NIGERIA ADVICE !
Hello, my name is Sandra Stone, I'm from Uk, i
love my husband so much and i do anything
to please
him on bed.. i even suck his dick too but he
has refused to suck mine.. pls advice me how
to tell him to go down on me cos i really want
my pussy juice sucked.
Comments
* James silva : I think u need to talk to him,
marriage is communication.
* Sarah water : Oh my dear,sorry abt that.. ve
bin in ur shoes before .. i told him right away
when we were aving sex and he is an expert
in it
* Micheal paper : I get downwt my wife, its
cool i love doing it.. u shud talk to ur husband.
NIGERIAN PAGE !
My name is Aminat, i stay in Abuja, married
wta kid, my husband have refused to suck my
p***y,
what shud i do.. No insults abeg
COMMENTS
* Dayo muyiwa : Fool, sex na food?
* Nkiru joy : Yu are a disgrace to
womanhood..sham e on u
* Idris kunle : Any news abt Assu strike?
* Toheeb sule : If u want i can suck for u call
my no 0708312455
* Funmi Leye: I no blame u at all better go
findsomtn do wt ur life, suck koor, soakaway
nii
* Richard oke : Abeg who get bb charger
* Amaka Achebe : U r a prostitute, u need
deliverance!
hahahaha, stil cnt stp laffin

1 Like

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