ogawisdom:
I can't love any woman more than my mum

I hope my wife doesn't hear this lol it's the truth.

No one can love me more than my mum, unconditional love personified. If not for children do we even need to marry

Don't bother with marriage then.

You can source for kids in other ways.

Rubbiish:

His mother becomes what?

Just Marry your mother and don't torture another person's daughter.

Funny how we keep cherry picking.

The man that does not understand oneness in marriage will open his mouth to yap about submission.

Gen 2:28 clearly states that a man will LEAVE his mother and father and CLEAVE to his wife and the two will become one flesh.

Simple, short and precise.

If you are not ready to do this, don't bother with Christian marriage or hoping to reap its benefits.

Rubbiish:

Keep deceiving yourself
I hope u will say same when your son grow up
Do u know d meaning of unconditional love??
Only a mother got unconditional love for his son, no woman on earth love can surpass that which the mother have for his son. That man you are calling hubby, there are certain conditions he may be in and if he approach u, u will turn down his offer, only a mother will stand behind his son regardless of his condition & this will ever make mothers special in the life of her son. There is a special spot we men keep for mothers in our life, no other woman can take that spot...

Mothers don't have unconditional love for their daughters?

Fathers don't have unconditional love for their daughters?

When I start to hear 'my mom is first' bla bla, it tells me that such mother never enjoyed the love of her husband so her son has to compensate.

I do not see sons from loving families have 'excessive' love for their mothers.

Can we ask why these men never profess such love for their fathers?

Or are the fathers not worth it? Or the fathers did not sacrifice for their children? Or their fathers cannot do anything for them?

Well, like I tell my sisters, shine your eyes.

Logobenz2:
bunch of jokers.
I asked her how old her son is,she no respond
They think moulding a man is easy.

Father's don't participate in this molding?

bukatyne:


Just Marry your mother and don't torture another person's daughter.

I am afraid u re misconstruing my point
You can't completely detach a man from his root, every member of the family has different place in the life of a man, it doesn't mean the mother is important than the father, likewise the wife, this is where u ladies are getting it wrong. I am laying emphasis on mothers because the thread was specifically created for mothers, it doesn't mean fathers, siblings are less important, they all have different place in a man's life. You won't understand this because u are a lady, only a man can relate

What is the nonsense above?

Logobenz2:
Do you have male children?

There is no gainsaying women with hate for men hardly give birth to male children, my sister is a good example. U want God to give such a woman with a biased mindset towards men a male child? God will only give u what u can care for, not what u will abuse...
She deserve only daughters, God doesn't want someone raising another bobrisky...

jenifer007:


O Ku orire....For the fact your mother sacrificed all for you, you can only show your appreciation by being there for her but she can never be your first wife. My prayer for you is to marry a wonderful woman,even your mother will have confidence in her and they both will love each other dearly.That will make you a happier man.

The bold is what we have been saying...We Don't hate our wives, everyone deserve happiness...i m glad u finally understand our point...u will be the final beneficiary of this when u re of age...

Not yet. Maybe I will. Maybe I won’t.

But if I do, their wives will be their priorities. As I am my husband’s priority, as my mother-in-law is my father-in-law’s priority.

There’s no comparison. The love is just different and it’s not any less than the love a man will give his wife. It’s just different.

Logobenz2:
Do you have male children?

As usual, and not surprisingly, here is what the irresponsible folks overlooked about the topic:

- The thread title says "family" meaning people, not a person.

- Most immediately jumped up to defend their "family", which to them does not mean their wife and offspring. They feel nothing for these ones (especially the wife) besides hostility.

-Many are behaving as if their "family" specifically requires them to have these attitudes, like a deep fear their status in their family is somehow under threat if they don't behave in this manner.

- Women are telling some folks they don't require this excessive show of foolishness to prove filial love, anything or whatever you call it, the person (a man, supposedly) is still arguing they do. Unfortunately, excessive attachment to a particular person, be it wife or mother, is never good for your mental health. You might not know this, but it hinders your ability to function effectively as an adult. That's why a mother who knows maturity would not encourage it.

Logobenz2:
I know it's heart breaking but it's the truth.
How does someone that doesn't live nor provide for us be unfair to us or the wife?
She stays somewhere else to start with,so how hard can it be to ignore a person that is unfair whom you don't see everyday?
Or will you be ok if your mom treats me UNFAIR and I begin to banter or drag with her?
Like I said,there is no point arguing this because no real man will side you to castigate his mom,whether she is right or not!harsh reality.
Some will come here and start typing feminine epistles but dare retaliate or counter their mothers and deal with the consequences.
Once more,ignore for peace to reign in your home or better still,pretend

Nobody is asking you to castigate her per se, it’s more like just calling her attention to the fact that she might be overstepping, how is that such a bad thing to do? So you’ll say nothing if your mum was being disrespectful to you as a man? Or are you suddenly saying your mum can do no wrong because someone else’s daughter is the one involved?

Meanwhile, there so many ways in which your mum can be unfair to your wife, living with you or not, how exactly is this even something you don’t know?

thorpido:
Okay o.
Yes,it's very common around here.The culture and the extended family set-up.
However,it has to do with training and how one grows up.

I think I agree with the training part but then, as an adult who’s mentally balanced and loves their wife, shouldn’t common sense come to play here? I’m saying because, I really can’t see any excuse for such behavior.

sassysure:
Not all.
I have seen cases where men are diffusers, neutral and when pressed in a very tight corner, will take his wife's side.

Marriage, if u cough, it will be misinterpreted. Common cough u can cough any how in your father's house

Haha! I know a man like that anyways though it took a while before he totally got to his wife’s corner, she had to stand her ground and fought for what she considered her right, when dealing with her MIL, and somehow, it worked for her, however a gazillion others haven’t been so lucky.

When your man always sides with his family, then simply stop fighting your husband's family. When there is no fight, there won't be a need or reason to take his parents' sides.

bukatyne:


Mothers don't have unconditional love for their daughters?

Fathers don't have unconditional love for their daughters?

When I start to hear 'my mom is first' bla bla, it tells me that such mother never enjoyed the love of her husband so her son has to compensate.

I do not see sons from loving families have 'excessive' love for their mothers.

Can we ask why these men never profess such love for their fathers?

Or are the fathers not worth it? Or the fathers did not sacrifice for their children? Or their fathers cannot do anything for them?

Well, like I tell my sisters, shine your eyes.

U are absolutely right.
But, some of the mothers, despite having their husband's unconditional love are still extremely possessive of their sons especially the rich ones.
The answer is control.

If u are a control freak, no amount of love will do.

U see manipulative and competitive young girls? ( competitive in the sense that they will want to have what their friend has, they metamorphosis into young women who will want their boyfriend to buy that latest iPhone for them not because they need it or the guy has the money but because the hottest babe in town or class has that), they are the type that cling to their sons.
They emotionally blackmail their sons with sob stories that their wives will be a nobody before them.
They don't actually love their sons. They did what they should do as mothers( it's ur obligation to train ur child as long as u have decided to get pregnant and have a baby.
U don't do ur child any favour at all.its ur job. The emotional manipulation don't work) but they use that to hold and control their sons as long as they are alive.
It takes some times for some sons to shake off that shackle of control and see their wonderful mum as who she is.
A control freak.
My aunt is a perfect example. She was worst than patience uzorkwor
Her son almost killed the wife( 8 months pregant) b4 this man got himself. The only difference was he was not sleeping with her mother. The mum was the wife.
When this man got himself he became completely opposite.
The hatred he had for this woman was second to none and barred him from visiting him in the city.

sassysure:

U are absolutely right.
But, some of the mothers, despite having their husband's unconditional love are still extremely possessive of their sons especially the rich ones.
The answer is control.

If u are a control freak, no amount of love will do.

U see manipulative and competitive young girls? ( competitive in the sense that they will want to have what their friend has, they metamorphosis into young women who will want their boyfriend to buy that latest iPhone for them not because they need it or the guy has the money but because the hottest babe in town or class has that), they are the type that cling to their sons.
They emotionally blackmail their sons with sob stories that their wives will be a nobody before them.
They don't actually love their sons. [b]They did what they should do as mothers( it's ur obligation to train ur child as long as u have birth to him or her. U don't do ur child any favour at all.its ur job.[/b]They The 3motional manipulation don't work) but they Use that to hold and control their sons as long as they are alive.

When you get to oshodi ehn,repeat this same line to all those hungry,homeless kids you see under those bridges you hear?
Nonsense!!
Did the mothers of those children do what they were suppose to do?
Now some of us did not pass through all of that horror because heroes gave birth to us and we will worship them till we die.
I repeat,no woman is worthy enough to get the same kind of love a son should give her mother who sacrificed her all to give their kids a better life.
Only an idiotic man does that.

freecocoa:
Haha! I know a man like that anyways though it took a while before he totally got to his wife’s corner, she had to stand her ground and fought for what she considered her right, when dealing with her MIL, and somehow, it worked for her, however a gazillion others haven’t been so lucky.

Instead of me to marry such, I will remain in my father's house
My people accepts children out of wedlock wholeheartedly and the child belong to u. No man will come to claim any child even if he knows u have his child so I will kukuma stay at my father's compound and give birth .

The guy I dated was mummy's boy.
People were expecting us to go to next level but I was busy planning on how to escape
One day I might vex and call her out, and they will descend on me
I don't like body pain o.
Has phobia for that.
I will even faint before the first blow land

Logobenz2:
When you get to oshodi ehn,repeat this same line to all those hungry,homeless kids you see under those bridges you hear?
Nonsense!!
Did the mothers of those children do what they were suppose to do?
Now some of us did not pass through all of that horror because heroes gave birth to us and we will worship them till we die.
I repeat,no woman is worthy enough to get the same kind of love a son should give her mother who sacrificed her all to give their kids a better life.
Only an idiotic man does that.

If u want to quote me so we will engage in a discuss, u have to be civil.

sassysure:

If u want to quote me so we will engage in a discuss, u have to be civil.

I wonder the kind of response you were expecting,probably a bidding contract kind of write up since what you wrote was so polite.
Emotional Blackmail as usual,not surprised at all

freecocoa:
I think I agree with the training part but then, as an adult who’s mentally balanced and loves their wife, shouldn’t common sense come to play here? I’m saying because, I really can’t see any excuse for such behavior.

The bolded is questioned.Do they really love their wives?
The ones who can't defend their wives actually want a wife but love their families more.

nairalandposter:
Hopefully these "nude ladies" dancing in transparent vehicles in traffic, would get defenders like we're seeing here after some time.

Those nudes ladies(girls of this generation) are definitely the one dragging position with our conservative mothers who sacrificed everything!!!

freecocoa:
Hmmm, how can one ignore all of that? I mean, your wife has to deal with your mum, she just has to, expecting her to constantly ignore unfairness is not a very loving thing to do, and then threatening to get angry if her human side eventually shows, is just heartbreaking to say the least.

Unfortunately, you are coming from a bias perspective and makes it difficult to explain to you. While I agree some men would support their family over you, i think it is about finding a way to show that their actions hurt you so that he understands but many times, most women would rather nag about it.

Rubbiish:

His mother becomes what?

whats the role of his father ?

Rubbiish:

@bold u make laugh
The wife and mother have different place in the life of man, every man got only one mother, but number of wife is unlimited.
U will naturally sound like this, till your son grow up, only then u will understand the pain of having an ungrateful son. The sacrifice a mother will make for her son, very few wives, if any sef can ever make it. U think it is easy to mould a man? Wait till u your son grow up

Freecocoa is a lesbian and knows nothing about raising a child, dont allow her mislead u

stop lying to your self there is nothing called "sacrifice a mother make for her son " its self pity statement if your not raped then their is no sacrifice its your job to look after the child dont make as if it was someone's job to look after the child

the only people who can claim to your word sacrifice are mothers who were raped or any other person who is/or looked after someone's child eg any close relatives because it was their choice to have that child

the rest its a choice they made to have a child via marriage, unprotected sex, unplanned pregnancy etc therefore your are required to look after the child irregardless whether your got the means to look after the child or not, there the decision to have unprotected sex or unplanned pregnancy was your choice

please dont self pity as if it was someone's job to look after the child

eni4real:
Those nudes ladies(girls of this generation) are definitely the one dragging position with our conservative mothers who sacrificed everything!!!

Please what did your mother sacrifice? Tell me one thing your mother did, that isn't her job as a mother?

You better not transfer this mentality to your child, the decision to bring another human being into this world shouldn't be one made lightly.
It also shouldn't be laden with emotional blackmail such that the child is left feeling like they owe you a debt of gratitude.

If you had a healthy relationship with your mum, you will love her deeply, and not be beholden to her.

CanadianNaija:


Please what did your mother sacrifice? Tell me one thing your mother did, that isn't her job as a mother?

You better not transfer this mentality to your child, the decision to bring another human being into this world shouldn't be one made lightly.
It also shouldn't be laden with emotional blackmail such that the child is left feeling like they owe you a debt of gratitude.

If you had a healthy relationship with your mum, you will love her deeply, and not be beholden to her.

What my mother did is beyond her responsibility. She went extra mile... Not all mums are the same.. You can only speak for your mum and I speak for mine!!!

eni4real:
What my mother did is beyond her responsibility. She went extra mile... Not all mums are the same.. You can only speak for your mum and I speak for mine!!!

loud am baba,I dey with You.
Team momma's boys
We are the new cool.

Logobenz2:
loud am baba,I dey with You.
Team momma's boys
We are the new cool.

Don't mind those manipulative folks...

eni4real:
Don't mind those manipulative folks...

I no really get strength to argue else I for counter some of their posts.
How would a person say that a mom's sacrifice doesn't matter but just an obligation to fullfill?
Doesn't sound serious to me at all.
So all those homeless kids feeding from trashcan,did their moms do what they were suppose to?
So isn't it a privilege some of us didn't go through that horrific path because of the sacrifices some of our moms made?
Personally,if not for my mom,I no know where I for dey walahi.
I cannot count the resources that woman pumped into me endlessly before I finally became a man.Did she owe me that?
Such a great woman I can never do without!
I was having some issues this morning in business and I called her,her strategy she gave me did not exceed a sentence yet I've got it all figured already.
Abeg mama you too much

Logobenz2:
I no really get strength to argue else I for counter some of their posts.
How would a person say that a mom's sacrifice doesn't matter but just an obligation to fullfill?
Doesn't sound serious to me at all.
So all those homeless kids feeding from trashcan,did their moms do what they were suppose to?
So isn't it a privilege some of us didn't go through that horrific path because of the sacrifices some of our moms made?
Personally,if not for my mom,I no know where I for dey walahi.
I cannot count the resources that woman pumped into me endlessly before I finally became a man.Did she owe me that?
Such a great woman I can never do without!
I was having some issues this morning in business and I called her,her strategy she gave me did not exceed a sentence yet I've got it all figured already.
Abeg mama you too much

Even fathers no dey drag positions with mothers
That is why it is said that, "Mother is gold"


My mum is my Cristiano/ Messi. She is the best!!!

Any girl that think she is woman enough to drag position with my mum should wait for her time.. May be when she invest all her energies, resources and youth on her son, she will get the same Idol treatment from him.. Only time will tell..

But for now, all these girls should see themselves as a Chukwueze

Waiting for your turn to drag position with anybody or being an idol is not what all mothers aspire to.

I guess it's unpalatable to some people to imagine their mothers can have other interests besides them, very juvenile mindset as if this person with this attitude is still a child.

Looking for who would be at your back and call forever, typical Nigerian.

While pretending they are sir Gallahad fighting for their mothers, na war dem born una for?