armyofone: @ Dayokanu

They didn't like the way he treated their old mother.

I'd like to have children who will be defensive for me especially against a guy .
They are boys, i'm sure they know what has been going on in the house without the knowledge of outsiders.

if they didnt like the way their mother was treated then let them treat their mother better.

What way was their mother treated that was bad? The man wanted a new wife and you cant begrudge him for doing what he wanted.

They took his house away from him and he didnt complain

WHAT MORE DO THEY WANT?

dayokanu:

How is the woman entitled to half his gratuity?

Assuming it was the woman who decides to leave would the man too be entitled to half her gratuity?

Of course!

Marriage is a partnership.

You need to read the bible bro.

My wife and I plan financially together. She would need to quit her work soon enough to raise our kids and she would always be worth half of everything we have. My brother-in-law has been inactive financially for the last few years due to cancer and he is also worth half of everything my sister and he have.

Marriage is a total commitment to partnership whether good or bad.

Sell the house....and share both house and gratuity into half ..give papa half and give mama half...

Is the mama supposed to enter dating market now ?

As for the kids ...an apple never falls far from its tree...they are really the kids of their father

speaking to myself : [s]later now they will say women this , women that....the daughter of a man like that is a dangerous specie to marry....as she don see the end before the beginning, her husband will see wen[/s]

Children - Hit the Road Dad
And don't you come back no mo' no mo' no' mo
Hit the Road Dad
And don't you come back No moooooooooooore!!


Daddy - Oh! Children oh Children, don't treat me so mean
You're the meanest Children that I've ever seen.
I guess if you said so
I'd have to pack my things and go. (That's right)



I swear that was the first thing that popped in my head!!

what their father did might have made their mom to be pshchologically unstable. the would piss up any *good* son even without ifa consultation.

dayokanu: The man was already kicked out of the house he built, What more do they need?

The woman too worked and she has a right to spend her own retirement too anyway she wants.

When the father decided to marry another wife, the children since they were sent to school should find a way to take care of their mom and not to be fighting their father

I repeat no Human should be forced to be in a relationship he doesnt want to be it 6hrs long or 6decades

Would it be better if the man stayed with their mom and killed her at night?

It is amazing the way most women have come here to educate Real Men about how the woman is a victim. How she has given the best years of her life. How she has suffered with him. How she gave him 4 wonderful kids.

They have come to feed their Real Men the wonderful being of women and shyt being of man, and surely the Real Men would nod and consume like utter mugus.

How far is any of them sure the wife was not an unsupportive nightmare to him in the mariage? How are they sure she was not a disrespectful wife? How far are they sure she did not have the accountability for the reetarded kids they raised? How far are they sure she did not raise them to hate him? How far are they sure all the kids are even his?

I don't know the man or his wife so I am not particularly in the position to judge. But I know most women are not as good and as Michael Angeloly painted by the women's real manning bandwagon.

As far as I am concerned, she might have or might have not deserved it.

Ibime:

Of course!

Marriage is a partnership.

You need to read the bible bro.

My wife and I plan financially together. She would need to quit her work soon enough to raise our kids and she would always be worth half of everything we have. My brother-in-law has been inactive financially for the last few years due to cancer and he is also worth half of everything my sister and he have.

Marriage is a total commitment to partnership whether good or bad.

Thats in a case where one partner is forced to give up his/her earning potential to cater for the family.

In cases where the other spouse didnt give up anything why should he/she take part of his gratuity?

The OP didnt tell us their mother was a full time housewife who gave up her career.

So what if the woman was also a top govt official who earned her own gratuity, Should she still take the mans money?

In which state? And what tribe did that?

ismhab: In which state? And what tribe did that?

armyofone: what their father did might have made their mom to be pshchologically unstable. the would piss up any *good* son even without ifa consultation.

Might have? How did you know their mom didnt also frustrate their father in the marriage?

We can only discuss what we know

The kids took the house from the man, And he didnt complain why should they come for his gratuity and beat him up in his rented apartment?

Foolish man. At this age he want to enjoy sweet sixteen without the woman whom have been with him thru thin and thick.

even if she is full time housewife and didn't give up any career, she is still entitled to whatever the guy has.


[quote author=dayokanu]
In cases where the other spouse didnt give up anything why should he/she take part of his gratuity?

The OP didnt tell us their mother was a full time housewife who gave up her career.

quote]

armyofone: even if she is full time housewife and didn't give up any career, she is still entitled to whatever the guy has.

What if she is not a Housewife? Why should she take half of what the man has? Give me a good reason why a wealthy woman should come and take half of what her broke husband has

chaircover: Saga o ti de o

If she was that bad, why didn't he leave her 25, 20, 15, 10 years ago?

Whay wait until he came into some money? Why did he marry an omoge? why didn't he go off with a 60 year old pensioner like himself. Oloju kokoro niyen

Ejo e ko, I maybe wouldnt have minded so much if the man had been rich and she had enjoyed his money all these years. . . . can you imagine! now that the soup is ready to be served the man went off and danced azonto with one sisi eko. . . . .and then men complain that all the spinsters out there are gold diggers. why wont they dig, when each time they sow, they are discarded before they have a time to reap. nonsense. He is a cretin

Did the man stop the woman from working to earn her own gratuity?

So you prefer if the man stayed and murdered the woman at home?

The man was honorable enough to ask for divorce/separation, he even gave up his house.

So what more do you want him to do?

STORY- STORY................

1. The children have no right to send their father packing.....there is nothing wrong in building a house for their mum..The parents have equal right to the kids, there is no point showing favouritsm to one parent and neglecting the other, except if the man had abandoned them, from the beginning (which is not the case here). The Bible says (and this for the christians that believe that God exist, not for the atheist) "honour your father and mother so that your days maybe long" and that is irrespective of whatever they do to you.

2. The father might have done worse, overtime to their mother, so it could have been from a pent-up frustration, and the kids decided that "enough was enough", still i do not support maltreating their dad..

3. If the man is tired of the woman, there is nothing wrong in divorcing her but doing it right. The gratuity, if not shared equally, 1/3 of it should have gone to the first wife....

dayokanu:

Did the man stop the woman from working to earn her own gratuity?

So you prefer if the man stayed and murdered the woman at home?

The man was honorable enough to ask for divorce/separation, he even gave up his house.

So what more do you want him to do?

He should also hand over absolutely every penny he has to his first wife. That's what more he should do.

Then we'll see how sweet he and his new wife are, koboless!

ronkebp: STORY- STORY................

1. The children have no right to send their father packing.....there is nothing wrong in building a house for their mum..The parents have equal right to the kids, there is no point showing favouritsm to one parent and neglecting the other, except if the man had abandoned them, from the beginning (which is not the case here). The Bible says (and this for the christians that believe that God exist, not for the atheist) "honour your father and mother so that your days maybe long" and that is irrespective of whatever they do to you.

2. The father might have done worse, overtime to their mother, so it could have been from a pent-up frustration, and the kids decided that "enough was enough", still i do not support maltreating their dad..

3. If the man is tired of the woman, there is nothing wrong in divorcing her but doing it right. The gratuity, if not shared equally, 1/3 of it should have gone to the first wife....

Excellent points.

With Point 3, Does it count that they have taken the mans house already? Why do they need his gratuity again?

Efemena_xy:

He should also hand over absolutely every penny he has to his first wife. That's what more he should do.

Why should he hand over every penny to her. She too has her own gratuity to live on. So why take another persons gratuity when you have yours

chaircover: Saga o ti de o

If she was that bad, why didn't he leave her 25, 20, 15, 10 years ago?

Whay wait until he came into some money? Why did he marry an omoge? why didn't he go off with a 60 year old pensioner like himself. Oloju kokoro niyen

Ejo e ko, I maybe wouldnt have minded so much if the man had been rich and she had enjoyed his money all these years. . . . can you imagine! now that the soup is ready to be served the man went off and danced azonto with one sisi eko. . . . .and then men complain that all the spinsters out there are gold diggers. why wont they dig, when each time they sow, they are discarded before they have a time to reap. nonsense. He is a cretin

Haba! CC which Sisi Eko? This is civil servant money we are talking about here oh!

It is probably some Tawakali Omo Iya Elero.

Baba musta being tage-ing with her for a long and she didn't give him face

Now that Money landed on his lap, Daddy Mi o fe oh has become Daddy Se e fe ni!

dayokanu:

Why should he hand over every penny to her. She too has her own gratuity to live on. So why take another persons gratuity when you have yours

No, not another person's but her's. They were married, not boyfriend and girlfriend. So what belonged to him belongs to her and vise versa. That's how it works in marriage.

Now if he decides to introduce a third person into the equation a.k.a the new wife, fine, let him do so - but not with the money that was earned from his first marriage.

I don't believe in robbing Peter (first wife) to pay Paul. Let Paul (yeye gold-digging new wife) go make it out on her own!

dayokanu:

Excellent points.

With Point 3, Does it count that they have taken the mans house already? Why do they need his gratuity again?

Well it is only fair to leave the gratuity for the man since the house has been taken, only if it is not worth 1/3 of the money though....

And just so we know....i am not supporting his attitude towards his wife....but we never can be 100% certain, the man knows why he wants to marry another wife, i don't understand why a 65 year old man would want to be buying pampers and paying for kinder- garten....Really the way some men think is annoying.

dayokanu:

Thats in a case where one partner is forced to give up his/her earning potential to cater for the family.

In cases where the other spouse didnt give up anything why should he/she take part of his gratuity?

The OP didnt tell us their mother was a full time housewife who gave up her career.

So what if the woman was also a top govt official who earned her own gratuity, Should she still take the mans money?

Stop talking like old school man.

We are not talking of Tom Cruise wife trying to collect half his kishi.

These two must have made plans together for the last 30-something years.

They must have planned the house together and made sacrifices accordingly.

No reasonable wife is looking to spend her partner's money after 30+ years of building together.

This is money they should be using to plan their retirement and investment in their kids, not throwing owambe. No woman who's been around that long is trying to "chop money" and the man should not see this money as "chop money" either because his struggle in life is not over as long as he has a wife who is not yet comfortable and kids who are not yet able to stand on their own.

Not only has he cheated his wife by trying to "chop money", he has cheated his children out of a platform for the future. The foolish man thought his responsibilities in life are over and its time for him to enjoy, that's the problem here. . .

^^

Well said. Couldn't have put it any better...

Woe betides anybody that beats his/her parents.no matter what the man did,the children has no right to send him out of the house..what if he had abandon them since childhood,would they've done anything?no. The man tried,sending them to school up to the tertiary level,whats the financial position of the wife?what ifshe is a full time house wife,what else do they want?do they expect the man to spend his entire life nursing them?i feel the man should njoy his remaining life by getting a new wife,afta many years of stress bringing the family 2geda..most of the blames falls to the children.

Ivynwa: Who is accusing Mac (who is a moslem) of sanctioning polygamy when his religion accepts that?

It is clear that the whole issue affected the woman mentally, someone once narrated to me how the same thing happened to their mother when their father took a second wife and they had to be treating her in a psychiatric hospital. What even gives some men the audacity to turn around and consider their wives "unbefitting" after getting old with them? The children should get medical help for their mother and stop patronizing the native doctors-prophets-and-prophetess that only help in breaking families apart with their crazy divinations and finger pointing.

As per the man the right proverb for him should be "Onye kpatara nku ahuhu si ngwere biara ya ugwo/ He who fetched an ant-ridden firewood invited lizards". What is that other woman still doing in that place? She better find her way and allow this unfortunate family to pull themselves together.

The United Nations Universal Declaration on Human Rights.

Articles 16 and 20 specifically.

Furthermore, even without this, who you choose to be with is a fundamental human right.

Ibime:

Stop talking like old school man.

We are not talking of Tom Cruise wife trying to collect half his kishi.

These two must have made plans together for the last 30-something years.

They must have planned the house together and made sacrifices accordingly.

No reasonable wife is looking to spend her partner's money after 30+ years of building together.

This is money they should be using to plan their retirement and investment in their kids, not throwing owambe. No woman who's been around that long is trying to "chop money" and the man should not see this money as "chop money" either because his struggle in life is not over as long as he has a wife who is not yet comfortable and kids who are not yet able to stand on their own.

Not only has he cheated his wife by trying to "chop money", he has cheated his children out of a platform for the future. The foolish man thought his responsibilities in life are over and its time for him to enjoy, that's the problem here. . .

Have you forgotten they already collected his house?

armyofone:

The man is wrong! how can you treat someone like that? why didn't he share the money? i mean give her some.

Pple divorce everyday but please divorce with some sense and your sanity intact. a woman who has been with you all that long, given you 4 kids that you both raised! now you retire and hook up with a younger woman. How abt sharing the mooney or giving everything to her and start life afresh with your opeke?
What the man did was wrong. We may never know what their mama went through for the children to have acted like that.
no one is saying don't divorce but give that woman what she deserved!

ROFLMAO!!!

I honestly am laughing hard. I really believe you don't particularly believe in some of the things you say like the one in the bold, you just say it to get a reaction.

chaircover:

Actually considering your arguments, you had it rather easy.

Mo trust Ronke mi, she would have burnt the whole house down and ma jenny is kpekused up to the eyeballs and is rather mellow today too

Hehehe, they didn't know whether to tear me apart or ignore me. They got somewhere in-between. The topic is very sensitive for women, some of committed murder and others have lost it upstairs. A few have managed to deal with it in a graceful manner, these are exceptional ones.

chaircover: I am getting more and more convinced that dayo and saga are one and the same person.

The moment I saw Dayo questioning what right the woman had to half his gratuity, I knew that saga will be in here soon but not this soon. It took exactly 6 minutes

Dayo from what I read up there, my interpretation is that the man still lived at home with wifey but he rented a place for his sisi bride and it was from the family house that his things were thrown out.

chaircover: Saga o ti de o

If she was that bad, why didn't he leave her 25, 20, 15, 10 years ago?

Whay wait until he came into some money? Why did he marry an omoge? why didn't he go off with a 60 year old pensioner like himself. Oloju kokoro niyen

Ejo e ko, I maybe wouldnt have minded so much if the man had been rich and she had enjoyed his money all these years. . . . can you imagine! now that the soup is ready to be served the man went off and danced azonto with one sisi eko. . . . .and then men complain that all the spinsters out there are gold diggers. why wont they dig, when each time they sow, they are discarded before they have a time to reap. nonsense. He is a cretin

Why wait?

Maybe because that is the best time that maximises benefit to him.

If a woman wants to do the same is that not the same tactics she would use?

Ah! Shair-Shair! Me I know women. Mo mor yin!

She would do her own in the best way that benefits her and you know what? Real Men and women would turn around and blame him saying "He did not treat her right", "She is long suffering".

Personally, frankly, I have some pity for her because she is from an era of mostly dedicated and good women.

If it was any of the women of this generation, I no go feel any pity for them. As a matter of fact, I wish this type of misery on at least about 30% of them in future.

No pity!

maclatunji:

Hehehe, they didn't know whether to tear me apart or ignore me. They got somewhere in-between. The topic is very sensitive for women, some of committed murder and others have lost it upstairs. A few have managed to deal with it in a graceful manner, these are exceptional ones.

What is your definition of "dealing with it in a graceful manner"