Abeg strikt you for no put pygru for right wing attack o....the boy dey attack like musa.....him no dey know the direction of him attack.....................

CAMEROONPRIDE: Striktlymi funny thread.
Yeaa I'm really laughing ..you are very funny.

But you can't still b saved.

Proudly pagan

ijawkid: Abeg strikt you for no put pygru for right wing attack o....the boy dey attack like musa.....him no dey know the direction of him attack.....................

Ijawkid, Boomark, & truthislight
open the link below

https://www.nairaland.com/1252257/facts-should-know-jehovahs-witnesses#1252257.19

ijawkid: Abeg strikt you for no put pygru for right wing attack o....the boy dey attack like musa.....him no dey know the direction of him attack.....................

Na so o my brother! The guy attacking prowess no get mate

Pygru:


Ijawkid, Boomark, & truthislight
open the link below

https://www.nairaland.com/1252257/facts-should-know-jehovahs-witnesses#1252257.19

You see what I'm saying........the boy plays second half of a match before finishing first half....na this kin person wan attack??.......chei......goshen abeg come put somebody else wey I fit give better iniesta-like pass to..............

Bidam: Lol.. where is the referee to blow the shofar let the game begin.. am not happy being in the reserve though...me wanna play to win trophies.

Nice thread... Gudos to the Op. Can I be among the tithe collectors ticket sellers?

Rich4god: Nice thread... Gudos to the Op. Can I be among the tithe collectors ticket sellers?

LWKMD!!!

People like us go dey supporters club cheering the main men on the field.
I no even know which team I belong to.

toba a muslim

Nice thread strik...why isn't Rey on the defence though?

HumbledbYGrace: toba a muslim

Nice thread strik...why isn't Rey on the defence though?

Nah Toba is Christian! Just my mistake!

inspiredbyGOD:.:
People like us go dey supporters club cheering the main men on the field.
I no even know which team I belong to.

I want to believe you will find your way to God's side!

tchidi: *screaming*
Buy ya cold Zobo!!!! Buy Zobo!!
*turns to Goshen*
Coachee, u no go buy ya boiz zobo?!

Ta, stop dat dia!! You wan give them cholera??

Boiz, when you're ready tell me make I go arrange orobo Pepsi and gala for everybodi

jayriginal:

Nope. No problem. Note that I used the word "mildly" to qualify it.

I apologize though if you are offended by it.

Peace.

I'd like you to understand my person personally. I can never be offended by that which how it came to be, I'm still figuring how to understand, talk more, understanding it. You can keep your apology to yourself until I come to understand. Like somebody hasn't eaten beef in a while.

deebrain: how i wish that nairaland religious thread can be this fun! This is so cool. May God bless the op.
Now seriously why am i not in the list of the christian team? (he goes to rant on twitter)

Lolol. Are you in any way related to osaze?

striktlymi:

Nah Toba is Christian! Just my mistake!

ayt

Ishilove:
Ta, stop dat dia!! You wan give them cholera??

Boiz, when you're ready tell me make I go arrange orobo Pepsi and gala for everybodi

but it was produced under d supervision of a born again, non tithe collecting spirit filled, tongue speaking microbiologist. Its healthy and anointed!!

Ermm, Ermm *okay, official signal...trynna make a or some changes*

The match is very hot right & I need make 1 or 2 changes. #Consulting with technical adviser mode activated before making changes#

1. I need HOLY WATER NOW, THE HOLY WATER will work miracles. I need Prophet Bidam to get us that ASAP or we send EMERGENCY words to MOST SENIOR PROPHET T.B JOSHUA. but, tchidi, can continue selling cold zobo to spectators ONLY WHILE THE ZOBO REMAINS COLD.

2. I need take that pygru guy out of the field and bring JeSoul in but my fear is, I hope we won't have to bring JeSoul out again within 2 minutes but make I see wetin she fit play as she dey dare TECHNICAL ADVISER. That pygru guy is just running round the field AIMLESSLY.

*mock salute*
Coacheeee!!!! Na u we know!!!!
Goshen na u be oga! X2
Any other coach, na so so yeye!
Any other coach, na so so yeye!!

Goshen360: Ermm, Ermm *okay, official signal...trynna make a or some changes*

The match is very hot right & I need make 1 or 2 changes. #Consulting with technical adviser mode activated before making changes#

1. I need HOLY WATER NOW, THE HOLY WATER will work miracles. I need Prophet Bidam to get us that ASAP or we send EMERGENCY words to MOST SENIOR PROPHET T.B JOSHUA. but, tchidi, can continue selling cold zobo to spectators ONLY WHILE THE ZOBO REMAINS COLD.

2. I need take that pygru guy out of the field and bring JeSoul in but my fear is, I hope we won't have to bring JeSoul out again within 2 minutes but make I see wetin she fit play as she dey dare TECHNICAL ADVISER. That pygru guy is just running round the field AIMLESSLY.

We just got word that Coach Goshen has made a tactical move after being two goals down just before the break...I tell you, this team Islam are smoking hot. They haven't even touched the ball and they are already two goals up...We just learnt that the player being substituted is the new kid on the block (pygru) who has been found guilty of scoring the two own goals against his team...

Oh no, what am I seeing...pygru has poked his hand into the eyes of a fellow team mate (Ijawkid)...I just hope this does not demoralize the Christian team as they need nothing short of a miracle to get out of this predicament...Coach Goshen really got a lot of work to do if he hopes to get past this record breaking team Islam.

WHAT!!!...the rules of the game have just been re-written right under the very nose of the ever watchful Maclatunji...the Christian team has just brought in Jesoul (a former referee). Rumour has it that Jesoul was a prolific attacker during her spell with the team...now she is back from retirement!

Does this mark the end of the unbeaten run of team Islam? I have just been informed that the miracle of always playing at home perfected by team Islam has been put on hold with the coming of Jesoul...this is going to be a cracker of a match I tell you. If you think the match between Dortmund and Malaga was tough then wait and see the outcome of this epic match..

But wait...I see Maclatunji putting on a jersey and...oh no!!! a boxing glove!!! Maclatunji is really breathing out fire and brimestone...FIFA ooooooooo! Where arth thou before some borry wound some borry for hear o!

Ladies and gentlemen, the match has been put on hold pending word from the FIFA president, Seun, on the use of boxing gloves in the field of play...as we await official word from Seun...let's go through the Christian eleven formation again:

^^^^^

Peace and much Love brother.


Can you kindly change my team , some of my team members are scoring goals in the opposite direction .

frosbel: ^^^^^

Peace and much Love brother.


Can you kindly change my team , some of my team members are scoring goals in the opposite direction .

LWKMD!!!

Okay, that team is okay for Christians now. @ all my mid-fielders, I neey y'all do some dangerous pass now. I want JeSoul, Image123 and Frosbel score me some goals right now! C'mon boys....YES, WE CAN!

frosbel: ^^^^^

Peace and much Love brother.


Can you kindly change my team , some of my team members are scoring goals in the opposite direction .

Frosbel will always be Frosbel

Lol.
Maybe it's because of the shifting nature of the goalposts.
If you quit shifting the goalposts, they might actually find the right net.
Cheers!

striktlymi:

We just got word that Coach Goshen has made a tactical move after being two goals down just before the break...I tell you, this team Islam are smoking hot. They haven't even touched the ball and they are already two goals up...We just learnt that the player being substituted is the new kid on the block (pygru) who has been found guilty of scoring the two own goals against his team...

Oh no, what am I seeing...pygru has poked his hand into the eyes of a fellow team mate (Ijawkid)...I just hope this does not demoralize the Christian team as they need nothing short of a miracle to get out of this predicament...Coach Goshen really got a lot of work to do if he hopes to get past this record breaking team Islam.

WHAT!!!...the rules of the game have just been re-written right under the very nose of the ever watchful Maclatunji...the Christian team has just brought in Jesoul (a former referee). Rumour has it that Jesoul was a prolific attacker during her spell with the team...now she is back from retirement!

Does this mark the end of the unbeaten run of team Islam? I have just been informed that the miracle of always playing at home perfected by team Islam has been put on hold with the coming of Jesoul...this is going to be a cracker of a match I tell you. If you think the match between Dortmund and Malaga was tough then wait and see the outcome of this epic match..

But wait...I see Maclatunji putting on a jersey and...oh no!!! a boxing glove!!! Maclatunji is really breathing out fire and brimestone...FIFA ooooooooo! Where arth thou before some borry wound some borry for hear o!

Ladies and gentlemen, the match has been put on hold pending word from the FIFA president, Seun, on the use of boxing gloves in the field of play...as we await official word from Seun...let's go through the Christian eleven formation again:

{ranting on twitter}
See what ive been saying? despite my contributions to the team, some back stabbers ally with the coach to make some people scape goats @fanofdeebrain...{earlier tweet}deebrain a new list is just out and you are not in it...

striktlymi: ATHEIST FIRST ELEVEN:

Whom shall the Atheists look to for help? The Christians claim that their help comes from the Lord but where will the help of Atheists come from??

This has been the question on the minds of every football fan since the un-ceremonious departure of the inspirational Coach/Top striker, the one and only Logicboy. It is Rumoured in some quarters that the former Head Coach, Logicboy had to go on a quest to the 'Sugar candy' mountain where he hopes to do some soul searching with the Spaghetti monster.

Despite the difficulty of losing such an inspirational Coach and Player, the new Head Coach, Muskeeto, has looked the way of the Pagan duo (Pagan 9ja and Cameroonpride) for help. He is determined to revamp this Atheist team and give them the much needed inspiration in order to return to their glory days.

Team B: Atheist

---

LINE-UP:

Goalkeeper: Ifeness

The job of Ifeness is no small task because the heart of the Atheist strategy lies deep within the defense since the departure of LB. When Ifeness is not busy arguing about the design, trajectory or calculating the angle of elevation of the ball, he is busy coordinating his defense line wherein the attack of the Atheist begins.

Right Wing Back: Mazaje; Right Centre Back: cyrexx; Left Centre Back: jayriginal; Left Wing Back: Wiegraf

These are what they call 'I take no nonsense from anyone' kinda defenders. Any attacker is to be taken down irrespective of his size and speed. The strategy is simple actually, calculate the velocity of the oncoming striker, determine his body mass, calculate his heart rate and determine how many strides he will take before he gets to the defense and in one swooping motion, all the defenders will pounce on him, collect the ball and head towards the opponents goal. If you think this method is not effective then try and open a thread titled: 'the fool says in his heart that there is no God' and watch your well thought out attack come crashing down.

Right Central Midfield: Kay17; Centre Midfield: platton; Left Central Midfield: Cameroonpride

Morale has been generally low for these players since LB left. Cameroonpride has been loaned from the pagan squad to beef up the team. It remained to be seen if these guys can lift up their spirits and return back to their glory days when dribbles were dribbles and any strike will result in a goal.

Strikers: Alfaman and ooman

Alfaman has been forced to play a bit deep into the attack, behind ooman, the new top striker. His prowess in front of goal is yet to be tested as the referees, Jesoul and manmustwack, have been quick to issue him a red card whenever he is with the ball. This however is just a small glitch cause the new coach is on the job.

It is rumoured in some other quarters that ooman chased Logicboy away due to a disagreement on who will be the top striker. Though the authenticity of that information is in question, but what is not in question is the ability of ooman to spare-head this Atheist attack without much help. His game has been a little on the downside of late cause the other members of the team are not willing to pass the ball to him cause of his quarrel with LB. Again, the coach is working on this.

RESERVE: Pagan 9ja

I have just been informed that no player is willing to stay on the reserve bench with pagan 9ja because he has assumed the role of the teams 'medicine man' cum Dibia. He bluntly refused to be in the first eleven because he believes the Gods need him to monitor the excesses of the weapon of mass destruction of the Christians (Obadiah777). He can't do that from the field, hence his willingness to be off the pitch to attend to his divination. With the talk of world war III looming, Pagan 9ja needs all the help he can get from the Gods.

COACH: Muskeeto

The coach has a lot to do with this team if he hopes to take on the Christian special eleven, comprising of players like Reyginus, InesQor, Davidylan and top striker Mr. Anoni. The future looks bleak but the coach has informed all who care to listen that he did not take up the job for taking sake, that a plan is in the offing which will help his boys return back to form.

wdf!!!!

Some people are beginning to take this thing seriously oooo.

lmaoooooooooooooo you got way too many jokes @ striktlymi. sup coach Goshen. take it easy on us sir. we refuse to train on the sabbath coach

Atheists to win hands down! A billion Yahweh will find it hard score a goal lol

inspiredbyGOD:.:
Some people are beginning to take this thing seriously oooo.

No mind those 'pikins' them ^ The title of the thread says....Just For Laughs!!!. Instead wey we go just take this thread dey cool our nerves, some will actually take it serious. I, with the help of the Technical Adviser, will start putting 'some' people in the bench soon.

Goshen360: You know that list cannot be complete without Obadiah777... By the way, this is a very good creative thread...for laughing. Well done bro.

i no sabi play soccer oooooo. make we switch position. make i coach. na you be the secret weapon

striktlymi, the only position i will change is truthislight. he is too belligerent to be in the mid-field. we need to make him the ball boy or the person who will wash our jersey after every game. midfield should be calm and composed like xavi