Shokoloko:


! Corinth 14:34 .... as the law says. Which law? The law of the Land. Paul said the women should be quiet and follow the law of Corinth.
In Matt 28:5-8 and Luke 20:17 because there was no "law of Corinth" Jesus in Luke and an angel in Matt instruct Mary Magdalene (a woman) to go and teach and preach to the brethren.
Jesus/ The angels did not ask Mary Magdalene to look for a male figure to tell, who can then relay the resurrection message to his brethren. He asked her to go herself.
From this we see that Mary was the first human who got the message of the great commission.

Was Abraham a leader in church? Was David a leader in church. These men were JEWS and not Christians. What part of 1 Tim 3:2 do you find confusing. A man can take a second wife but he cannot be a leader/ overseer of anything in church.
If you have a different interpretation of 1st Timothy 3 explain it, so we can learn.
Please as believers we must accept the word as it is or walk away from Christianity. There is nothing to twist in the bible. God is not an author of confusion

Olumaeme:
I'll tell you, sometimes you need violence to stop violence, and if you don't take that risk, it will be very difficult for you to stop it.

Most times, you can't talk bad people out of their bad behaviors, the best way to they learn is through a bitter experience and they'll never do that thing again

Next time she breaks anything, bring out some of her belongings and burn it. Then send her out to the house.

Let her beg at least 2 weeks before letting her return, if she Dosent turn a new leaf, send me a message I'll credit you 20k.

You also have to respect yourself and your union. I won't tell you not to cheat but please, try and be discreet and have some dignity.

Respect her, draw the line between your side babes and your family, caution yourself not to go above board.

Your side babe is a side babe and will remain a side babe, respect your wife!

The worst thing that can happen to a human being is not to know where they are not going.

You have to set principles and whoever breaks them should be adequately dealt with, which could be total withdrawal from the culprit.

Shalom!

Lasunray01:
Good day nairalanders. My first time post in 5yrs.

Will try to summarize the issues and seek sincere advise please.

I’ve been married before but got divorced within a year due to genotype issues(it’s a long story). So I remarried 2yrs after and with a child now, and that’s where my issues started from.

I know I have some bad sides too which I’m trying to change, which is flirting with single ladies, and this has caused multiple fight with my wife.

Whenever we have this fights, not physical, just verbal, but in her anger she breaks virtually anything around, cups, laptop, speakers etc. she can be madly angry. I’ve warned, petted her severally to desist from this act especially infront of our kid...but she won’t. It’s getting worse by the day. Now she reports me with blackmail to her parents and friends making me feel I’m the worst husband in the universe, calling me unprintable names. Calling me weak cos I don’t beat.

Now the advice I seek, we are planning to relocate as a family abroad this year, but I’m really scared. I can actually go alone, but would prefer we all go together since I have the means. But I’m scared if I won’t regret my actions to take her along with this her character. What if I get jailed or lose custody of our child abroad, because she’s a master in blackmail. She can turn simple issue overboard.


Sorry for the long epistle. Just had to pour out my mind. Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Thank you

Lasunray01:



Though, this has happened before too. In all, everyone's comment is appreciated. Will work on all options as suggested

Richy4:


There's a difference between preaching and go and tell... Mary was asked to go and tell the brethren that he is alive...Full stop...That was because Mary knew them (the brethren) ..
@ bold You said Paul was telling them to follow the Law of Corinth right? meaning that they should obey the law of the land... remember it was Paul also that wrote to Timothy right?

Now, Does the law in Nigeria permits People to marry more than one wife? Yes or No,...If yes, why do you think a polygamous man should not be a leader in the church...Considering the fact that the church in Corinth obeys their law by not letting women speak... shouldn't Christians abide by Nigerian law as well since the law permits more than one wife and allow any man who wishes to be a leader be instead of the segregation?

You touched a part that makes me believe that probably u don't understand the bible....How do you define a leader as a Christian...If Abraham and David were not leaders, I wonder who was .... If David did not lead the people of God, I don't know..( church signifies where people of God gather together not a building...The Israelites were also the people of God... and the got leaders)
or maybe you were implying that there are different God in Old and new testament?...If it was the same God, how did God allow some one with multiple wives to lead his people?

Don't U realize that Paul is just like u and I.. He was saying what he believed was right at that time... Some of it was in his own accord some were inspired by God..

Lasunray01:
Good day nairalanders. My first time post in 5yrs.

Will try to summarize the issues and seek sincere advise please.

I’ve been married before but got divorced within a year due to genotype issues(it’s a long story). So I remarried 2yrs after and with a child now, and that’s where my issues started from.

I know I have some bad sides too which I’m trying to change, which is flirting with single ladies, and this has caused multiple fight with my wife.

Whenever we have this fights, not physical, just verbal, but in her anger she breaks virtually anything around, cups, laptop, speakers etc. she can be madly angry. I’ve warned, petted her severally to desist from this act especially infront of our kid...but she won’t. It’s getting worse by the day. Now she reports me with blackmail to her parents and friends making me feel I’m the worst husband in the universe, calling me unprintable names. Calling me weak cos I don’t beat.

Now the advice I seek, we are planning to relocate as a family abroad this year, but I’m really scared. I can actually go alone, but would prefer we all go together since I have the means. But I’m scared if I won’t regret my actions to take her along with this her character. What if I get jailed or lose custody of our child abroad, because she’s a master in blackmail. She can turn simple issue overboard.


Sorry for the long epistle. Just had to pour out my mind. Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Thank you

Lasunray01:
Good day nairalanders. My first time post in 5yrs.

Will try to summarize the issues and seek sincere advise please.

I’ve been married before but got divorced within a year due to genotype issues(it’s a long story). So I remarried 2yrs after and with a child now, and that’s where my issues started from.

I know I have some bad sides too which I’m trying to change, which is flirting with single ladies, and this has caused multiple fight with my wife.

Whenever we have this fights, not physical, just verbal, but in her anger she breaks virtually anything around, cups, laptop, speakers etc. she can be madly angry. I’ve warned, petted her severally to desist from this act especially infront of our kid...but she won’t. It’s getting worse by the day. Now she reports me with blackmail to her parents and friends making me feel I’m the worst husband in the universe, calling me unprintable names. Calling me weak cos I don’t beat.

Now the advice I seek, we are planning to relocate as a family abroad this year, but I’m really scared. I can actually go alone, but would prefer we all go together since I have the means. But I’m scared if I won’t regret my actions to take her along with this her character. What if I get jailed or lose custody of our child abroad, because she’s a master in blackmail. She can turn simple issue overboard.


Sorry for the long epistle. Just had to pour out my mind. Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Thank you

Lasunray01:
Good day nairalanders. My first time post in 5yrs.

Will try to summarize the issues and seek sincere advise please.

Whenever we have this fights, not physical, just verbal, but in her anger she breaks virtually anything around, cups, laptop, speakers etc. she can be madly angry.

Now the advice I seek, we are planning to relocate as a family abroad this year, but I’m really scared. I can actually go alone, but would prefer we all go together since I have the means. But I’m scared if I won’t regret my actions to take her along with this her character. What if I get jailed or lose custody of our child abroad, because she’s a master in blackmail. She can turn simple issue overboard.


Sorry for the long epistle. Just had to pour out my mind. Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Thank you

Lasunray01:
Good day nairalanders. My first time post in 5yrs.

Will try to summarize the issues and seek sincere advise please.

I’ve been married before but got divorced within a year due to genotype issues(it’s a long story). So I remarried 2yrs after and with a child now, and that’s where my issues started from.

I know I have some bad sides too which I’m trying to change, which is flirting with single ladies, and this has caused multiple fight with my wife.

Whenever we have this fights, not physical, just verbal, but in her anger she breaks virtually anything around, cups, laptop, speakers etc. she can be madly angry. I’ve warned, petted her severally to desist from this act especially infront of our kid...but she won’t. It’s getting worse by the day. Now she reports me with blackmail to her parents and friends making me feel I’m the worst husband in the universe, calling me unprintable names. Calling me weak cos I don’t beat.

Now the advice I seek, we are planning to relocate as a family abroad this year, but I’m really scared. I can actually go alone, but would prefer we all go together since I have the means. But I’m scared if I won’t regret my actions to take her along with this her character. What if I get jailed or lose custody of our child abroad, because she’s a master in blackmail. She can turn simple issue overboard.


Sorry for the long epistle. Just had to pour out my mind. Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Thank you

Lasunray01:
Good day nairalanders. My first time post in 5yrs.

Will try to summarize the issues and seek sincere advise please.

I’ve been married before but got divorced within a year due to genotype issues(it’s a long story). So I remarried 2yrs after and with a child now, and that’s where my issues started from.

I know I have some bad sides too which I’m trying to change, which is flirting with single ladies, and this has caused multiple fight with my wife.

Whenever we have this fights, not physical, just verbal, but in her anger she breaks virtually anything around, cups, laptop, speakers etc. she can be madly angry. I’ve warned, petted her severally to desist from this act especially infront of our kid...but she won’t. It’s getting worse by the day. Now she reports me with blackmail to her parents and friends making me feel I’m the worst husband in the universe, calling me unprintable names. Calling me weak cos I don’t beat.

Now the advice I seek, we are planning to relocate as a family abroad this year, but I’m really scared. I can actually go alone, but would prefer we all go together since I have the means. But I’m scared if I won’t regret my actions to take her along with this her character. What if I get jailed or lose custody of our child abroad, because she’s a master in blackmail. She can turn simple issue overboard.


Sorry for the long epistle. Just had to pour out my mind. Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Thank you

Lasunray01:
No, thanks. I'm not seeking for a divorce. Just a way to make the marriage works that matters now

PrimadonnaO:
See how nairalanders, are with one voice, condemning a bad attitude.

There's hope for Nigeria, after all.

Shokoloko:

We are all here to learn
1. In Nigeria there is separation of church and state. There is NO law in the constitution in Nigeria that dictates the type of person who should head a church/ church departments. Since there is no law of the land /constitution concerning the headship of a church/church departments in Nigeria, we are bound to the law of Christ/the church. In some countries you cannot build a church - as long as the state forbids it, as Christians no need to make a fracas, do your evangelism and stick to your house fellowships.

If there is No law in a land concerning an issue, use the law of Christ
If there is a law in the land negating the law of Christ, use the law of Christ eg some communities have laws about wife swapping. It negates the law of Christ.
If there is a law in the land that neither negates/ nor agrees with the law of Christ use the law of the land. If the tax states to pay tax (it neither negates/agrees with Christ) pay the tax. If you are in a place where tax is not paid, why would you pay tax?

2 Can you prove that Abraham and David were Christians? I can prove that they were not. Acts 11:26 And the disciples were [b]called Christians first in Antioch.
Can you prove that Abraham and David were leaders IN CHURCH? I can prove that they were not. Acts 2:47, Acts 11:26 And the disciples were called Christians first in Antioch.[/b]

3. Explain 1st Tim 3:16 All scripture is given by [b]inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:

I would like you to use bible verses for your points since we are discussing from the bible. I will also do the same.

@ bold.. You are simply missing the point... and I am not going to deviate from the reason why I called you up which was leadership... I am not here really to answer mischievous questions that has not bases...

<<< just Incase you have forgotten the reason why I was engaging u, U said ..."No true believer should limit his walk with God by marrying a second wife. But if one has already married a second wife and became a believer then he can maintain the wives equally but he is barred from leadership roles.

Then I asked if Abraham and David that married more than one wife if they were not leaders.... and the people they lead were they not the people of God?... That was our argument right?... now u are asking me to prove if Abraham and David were Christians ....

You were implying that the God they served was different from the God of Christians...The Israelites that the bible referred to as the people of God, they were not of the same class as the present Christians because the mandate of their leadership was not directed and inspired by the holy spirit right?, The Christians leadership is better because it was mandated by Paul and should hence No need to make reference of the old Testament correct

I will suggest u read the bible.... pause and think about how it was applicable in future as well as the past...That can help u a lot to understand.

Righteousness2:
The Permanent cure to Bad and Sinful habits is in JESUS Christ.

But I must tell you the truth! The woman you are living with now is not your wife.

Your original wife is the woman u said you Divorced because of Genotype.
Listen! Genotype is not a reason to Divorce. As long as you two got married, she is your wife. You need to go back to your wife. Except you did not marry her. If you two got married, then she is your wife and you need to rectify that.

GOD ALMIGHTY, the GOD of Chosen Has healed many couples and changed their Genotype.

From Sorrow to Joy Happening this weekend 12th and 13th February is another opportunity.

Lasunray01:


Thank you. I always take responsibility for my actions. Just the relocation plans with these pending issues that's getting me worried.

Oyiboman69:
use your head not your heart... if you want a secured future for your kid,travel and make life alone before thinking of taking your wife along because even your neighbor will call police for you if they notice any shout from your house especially when they know you're a black man,trust me,the continuous visits of the police will later frustrate your effort and you'll later loose all you hold dear including you precious child. Besides na women you they carry,no be person you kill. let her grow to some stage before thinking of moving her there....

Richy4:


@ bold.. You are simply missing the point... and I am not going to deviate from the reason why I called you up which was leadership... I am not here really to answer mischievous questions that has not bases...

<<< just Incase you have forgotten the reason why I was engaging u, U said ..."No true believer should limit his walk with God by marrying a second wife. But if one has already married a second wife and became a believer then he can maintain the wives equally but he is barred from leadership roles.

Then I asked if Abraham and David that married more than one wife if they were not leaders.... and the people they lead were they not the people of God?... That was our argument right?... now u are asking me to prove if Abraham and David were Christians ....

You were implying that the God they served was different from the God of Christians...The Israelites that the bible referred to as the people of God, they were not of the same class as the present Christians because the mandate of their leadership was not directed and inspired by the holy spirit right?, The Christians leadership is better because it was mandated by Paul and should hence No need to make reference of the old Testament correct

I will suggest u read the bible.... pause and think about how it was applicable in future as well as the past...That can help u a lot to understand.

FireUpNow:
Good that you support no one. You don't even agree that the husband has his own fault

Lasunray01:
Good day nairalanders. My first time post in 5yrs.

Will try to summarize the issues and seek sincere advise please.

I’ve been married before but got divorced within a year due to genotype issues(it’s a long story). So I remarried 2yrs after and with a child now, and that’s where my issues started from.

I know I have some bad sides too which I’m trying to change, which is flirting with single ladies, and this has caused multiple fight with my wife.

Whenever we have this fights, not physical, just verbal, but in her anger she breaks virtually anything around, cups, laptop, speakers etc. she can be madly angry. I’ve warned, petted her severally to desist from this act especially infront of our kid...but she won’t. It’s getting worse by the day. Now she reports me with blackmail to her parents and friends making me feel I’m the worst husband in the universe, calling me unprintable names. Calling me weak cos I don’t beat.

Now the advice I seek, we are planning to relocate as a family abroad this year, but I’m really scared. I can actually go alone, but would prefer we all go together since I have the means. But I’m scared if I won’t regret my actions to take her along with this her character. What if I get jailed or lose custody of our child abroad, because she’s a master in blackmail. She can turn simple issue overboard.


Sorry for the long epistle. Just had to pour out my mind. Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Thank you

LofP:
Go Alone.

Kobojunkie:
A way to make the marriage work yet you are here asking if it is better to abandon your wife in Nigeria while you escape abroad for better life?

I live in the abroad that you are attempting to relocate to, and can boldly tell you that a [b]majority of those Nigerians who come here thinking they can continue doing things as they did in Nigeria are the ones who end up divorced and bitter. If that is what you plan to do abroad, then honestly, I suggest you stay in Nigeria cause no woman will live abroad that way with you, not at all.

Lasunray01:
Good day nairalanders. My first time post in 5yrs.

Will try to summarize the issues and seek sincere advise please.

I’ve been married before but got divorced within a year due to genotype issues(it’s a long story). So I remarried 2yrs after and with a child now, and that’s where my issues started from.

I know I have some bad sides too which I’m trying to change, which is flirting with single ladies, and this has caused multiple fight with my wife.

Whenever we have this fights, not physical, just verbal, but in her anger she breaks virtually anything around, cups, laptop, speakers etc. she can be madly angry. I’ve warned, petted her severally to desist from this act especially infront of our kid...but she won’t. It’s getting worse by the day. Now she reports me with blackmail to her parents and friends making me feel I’m the worst husband in the universe, calling me unprintable names. Calling me weak cos I don’t beat.

Now the advice I seek, we are planning to relocate as a family abroad this year, but I’m really scared. I can actually go alone, but would prefer we all go together since I have the means. But I’m scared if I won’t regret my actions to take her along with this her character. What if I get jailed or lose custody of our child abroad, because she’s a master in blackmail. She can turn simple issue overboard.


Sorry for the long epistle. Just had to pour out my mind. Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Thank you

Klass99:






@ Richy, what happened to the blue text na? This one dey wan pain eye small.

My sister!!... My blue ink ran out on the 31st December.....As per new year, the suppliers delivered only green colour ... I Say make I manage am till next year...It's of low quality...Nairaland no dey upgrade I swear...Everything is the same yesterday, today and forever