I don come patronise o, can I have coffee pls

patronise co,matronise ni,
ehm . . Id,
all the seats in this bar all have been occupied,i cant ask any of my esteemed customers to relinquish his/her seat for you,as they all made heavy orders. Shey you go stand?

mikuz:

patronise co,matronise ni,
ehm . . Id,
all the seats in this bar all have been occupied,i cant ask any of my esteemed customers to relinquish his/her seat for you,as they all made heavy orders. Shey you go stand?

Hmmm indirectly sayin am not welcome I get gist but u get issues. Ohh by d way y I go stand na inside molue dis bar dey

El, na em be this?
*shows him an empty wallet*

badosky,
na bar wey dey for banana island you dey refer to like that?
Anyway,just plaster ya arse for somewhere make i pass you the koffi.

so good to see d bar running helta skelta, , pls i need a plate of small stout n two bottles of suya a usual,

, me lof dis joint.

donkoll,
ima give ya usual. . .
Both this one wey you come carry polythene, you no go stay here download am?
Shooo! You wan carry am go house?
. . . And remember,you owe me over the last order you placed. I dey count am for you o.

Come o . . .
Is that no pharoah?
Hmm

U don give yinka d water wey I send am

haba,
id,
water ke,
she come here say make i give her a plate of pepper soup and a bottle big stout, say you go pay.
She just dey comot here now now.
*moves closer to badosky*
oya make i feel the money.

;d ;d ;d

Hmmm now u don jonz I never sign for parcel now, take me go court oooo.I didn't send her such message, pls dress back ur breathe is confusing my smelling glands u stink of locust beans is ur toothpaste made out of it ewwwwwh

jehovah armageddon!!
Id,
chinekem eh,
it is me that you are talks to like that?
Chei,
son of man has suffers.
So because you sees me in this joint as the joint tender that is why you thoughts you can talk to me how you likes,
Okwa ya?
I dont blames you.

You get luck say i no dey in the mood, I for don table ya CONTents here sharp sharp, and force you to pay in kind.
Lucky girl.

hmm,
blight you still dey here?
Shey na for this bar you wan spend the night abi?
Hope say you never drunk sef.
Oya come dey go,i wan close jor.

Nna chill dissolve all dis ur tone meehn na from me agberos dey collect tone, no make I change am  for u as u b nwa mummy I no say fear don hold ur penisss, oya adjust if u no wan make I involve ur matter reach base.Shoo see dis guy o no on d generator for my body o, if it start guy u go use iodine boil meat wetin u swallow?

hmm,
na your fluid i just swallow now now.
You no know wetin dey happen o.

Which shey my running nose u b pig o

no be only running nose you get, na racing nose.
Shey you enter ma bar by this time of the day dey ginger me abi?
Thank God say na only me and you remain,na here we go sleep o.
You must carry belle today today.
*runs after her*

*she sprints like d guniess holder usain away from d bar*

Oh good lord dat tenk gawd I sabi run na rapist dey run bar sha *breathing heavily*, d guy na bascardddd

lwkmd!!
No o!
Come na.
Shey you ma dey give agberos tones abi?
Come here come yarn okpata again, na caller tunez we go download together!

**driving into bar in ma escalade*good morning fellow drunkards*

yes good money bright,
welcome o.

3month after* Just got off d hohara desert n appear in dis fucking bar»»barman give me desert lizard and a bottle of Limca to step it down, will pay u with Naira coin.

Mehn,today dry o!!
*plugs in his headphones on his iphone4*
#if you were my girl,i would take you round the world,i'd take you places where you never ever been before,
so give me your hands,
im giving you my word,
i like it, i really really like it . . .

**looks up $ sees somebody dat looks like Neyshed,but d now looks like somebody coming from Libya. evidence of extreme suffering written all over his appearance.
Bartender pls atttend to dat alien over there!

neyshed,
are you sure spent only 3 months there?
Coins ke,
anyway,lemme bring ya order.
And please we dont accept coins here.

. . . Here's your order.
You better not pay me in coins.
Or else desert war go start here!

@bartender:what special receipt d??
o??
u have for this harmattan?

ehm. . .
Bright i didnt get that.
Hope you slept well last night.

@mik:u dindt get wat?Will u get dat second-hand ear-piece off ur ear!
I said I need receipt for limca wey I buy for Neyshed.Atleast I can use d receipt to open domiciliary account someday.

shooo!
Bright,
shey this joint don dey resemble electronic shop for ya eye abi?
Wey go dey make You ask for receipt inside bar!
No, wait . . .
I go give you both the invoice and the purchase documents.
No be only domiciliary,na dormitory account you go open!